PLEASE STAY WITH ME (Monotetra)

Another attempt

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I've chosen you, my dearest one
To be my love, my only man
We used to laugh, we had some fun
But now it's gone, but now it's gone.

I used to call and shout your name
I plead for love to be the same
As what I feel, but then you came
It's like a game, it's like a game.

You're here but how can I kiss you?
You always say what I should do
You're near but far, without a clue
You made me blue, you made me blue.

How could you do these things to me?
You want to leave so you are free
We have that pledge, why don't you see?
Please stay with me, please stay with me.

Author's Note

The monotetra contains four lines in monorhyme. Each line is in tetrameter (four metrical feet) for a total of eight syllables.The last line contains two metrical feet, repeated. It can have one stanza or many stanzas.

Poem format:
Line 1: 8 syllables
Line 2: 8 syllables
Line 3: 8 syllables
Line 4: 8 syllables with repetition

Credits to: © 2013 FanStory.com, Inc.
http://www.poetrydances.com/monotetra.php
Special credit to: Ms. Jewels' Dancing In White
http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/Julie-Ward/1299908/

Reviews

[Lydia Shutter]

How brave of you to be trying all these forms. This monotetra is excellent. I have always enjoyed the rhythm and rhyme in this form. The sadness of a broken heart permeates the lines. It is indeed sad when a person stands before you and you can touch him physically, but not mentally. Heart and soul must be connected to each other for a romance to work. Lydi**

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you, Lydi. Life is full of miracles and surprises. There are people who are there physically but not mentally and emotionally. It's a long process to work out...to revive the connection.

[Chris]

You succeeded in following the syllabic and repetitious form.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Really? Wow. Let's celebrate! LOL. Thanks, Chris.

[Sami Khalil]

I feel blue( just kidding), I have no clue why I like your romantic poems...Good as usual...Bravo..............

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you, Sami. =)

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)...................

[Eddie Davis]

Wow, very nice -- too complex and masterful for such a hillbilly like me, but it was very well done.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you, Eddie.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

There are times you are with someone physically but emotionally and mentally you're apart.
But then, life is so beautiful, full of hopes and promises...and choices.

[>.]

Hi, I really liked this piece it had that realistic give and take relationships always come with. It's never always calm sea's there is a roar in every ocean and for me it was like a conversation between a fisher woman and her boat, no matter what the circumstances she wants to journey through wonderful, deep, scary, beautiful oceans with her one and only vessel. I loved it.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thanks for the good thoughts you shared here. Nice analogy.

[Linda alexander]

You're near but far, without a clue
You made me blue, you made me blue.
Pain is so crystal clear in this poem, and also easily transmits to readers mind, liked the poem a lot, try to use the eye glasses which can transform everything to bearable form, take care

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you so much for the kind words.

[Linda alexander]

You most welcome, my pleasure

[Coyote Poetry]

You did very well using the structure poetry. I took 10 poetry classes in my lifetime. I don't like set standard and structure. The poem was sad and beautiful. Holding on is the last emotion we have. Hard to lose something we had for so long. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Yes, it's difficult to lose something so valuable that we kept for so long. So as with people, especially the one chosen to be your significant other. Life is a cycle. I always believe that it would turn and put us back in the right position/situation.
Thank you so much, CP.

[Author Unknown]

This is impressive write my fellow poet . Rhyming and last lines repeated emphasized the authors point

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thanks for the read and review. Glad this one impressed you as you said it is impressive. Monotetra form is one of my favorites now.

[Author Unknown]

Just explaining with metaphor . No offense .