the difference between house and home

the difference between house and home

A Poem by hiraethstill
"

there was never a family foundation to begin with

"
even before i reach it, i know
there are clothes on the bed
no different from any other time.
the shirts on the bottom 
are folded perfunctorily
underwear tossed haphazard
the closer to the top 
i look.
i think of my mother's house
barely any furniture
objects
things
clutter
to clutter the space or capitalize
colonize
my mind.
it's only one story
seven rooms
if i'm being generous
but it feels bigger than this
two story house
with suitcases full of
tarnished tatters of 
terrible secrets
objects
things
clutter
around my room that i leave
as is
my brother's first grade 
oil pastel artwork on the wall
the artless accumulation of 
stuff 
things
telltale traces of trauma
that tiptoe tactlessly
around troubled trinkets
only tangentially tangible terrain.
where
i think
where is 
the slippery sense of settling 
into my own skin
where is
the clutterless cupholder
made for me
where is 
when is
home

© 2020 hiraethstill


Author's Note

hiraethstill
Not really looking for this to be critiqued. Thanks for reading.

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Added on May 25, 2020
Last Updated on May 25, 2020
Tags: nonsense, thoughts, brain dump, mental health, family, divorce

Author

hiraethstill
hiraethstill

CA



About
An old soul, and probably the biggest dork you'll ever meet. Helping people and doing my best to make them feel accepted and cared for is why I was put on this earth. If I can do something for someone.. more..

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