The Louvre fugitive

The Louvre fugitive

A Story by Haim Kadman

A short surrealistic story


Right after having crossed the restaurant's threshold I've seen her. I couldn't believe my eyes, and kept rubbing them so astounded I was; but I recovered right away and moved towards her table very cautiously. She sat at the far end of the long restaurant's hall, which was almost empty apart from one couple and a lone customer; who didn't bother to cast an eye in her direction " whose direction? The Mona Lisa!!!

I approached very carefully, scrutinizing her features. Is it really her? Yes it's her without the slightest doubt!

She raised her eyes and watched me getting nearer suspiciously, without uttering a single word, she didn't even smile.

I bent forward putting my hands on the chair's back right opposite her.

'May I join you?' I asked her in a rather low voice.

'You may if you'll pay the bill.'

'Sure and with pleasure and not just the bill,' I replied smiling, moving the chair a bit backwards and sat down opposite her.

'There's no need to rush things,' she hastened to answer suspiciously still. 'Do behave as an old acquaintance of mine and don't betray my presence here, I've got here incognito.'

'I'm an old acquaintance of yours I adore you, but how did you get here? Have you left the Louvre?'

'I almost suffocated there behind the glass partition, it's so crowded on weekends, and the French wash once a month…

'But why Vienna I thought…'

'Well yes I would have preferred too a 'Roman holiday' and meeting Rafael now after Leonardo passed away… I would have followed him to Orvietto.'

'You mean Orbino…'

Che Dio m'aiuta, do you see what those exile years at the Louve have done to me?'

'Rafeal of all men, I was sure you would go on someone like Ticiano.'

'I'm not fond of the Venetian school, I always prefer Firenze.'

'So why not take on someone like Michel Angelo?'

'What, he isn't a painter, have you seen his blown up images in the Sistine Chapel, and he has a broken nose " I detest him!' She made a short pause and looked around all over the restaurant hall. 'I miss Rome so much and the days with Leonardo but they would have extradited me to the French, and here I'm safe.'   

'I see, I haven't thought on this point of view…'

'And where are you from?'

'I'm from the Holy land.'

'Oh really would you take me with you to Jerusalem… Oh no way, they'll display me in your national museum temporarily and return me to the Louvre.'

'What a pity, it would have been great if I would have taken you with me…'

'Okay forget it, you do stay in some hotel over here, don't you? So take me to your hotel when we'll end our dinner.'

'But I've come on my own, and…'

'So tell them I'm your cousin.'

'No it won't do… You know what, you'll enter the lobby a couple of moments after me, and if someone at the reception would wonder who you're, you'll tell him that I expect you at the bar.'

'Fine it seems an acceptable solution, but how are we going to sleep?'

'Oh, there is a rather wide double bed in there.'

'Okay we'll sleep together in the double bed, but no hands please!'

'For all I care let's do it without hands…'

'If that's what brewing in your head, I'm leaving addio!'

'No, no please don't go, I was just joking!' I cried rising to my feet ready to reach her and persuade her to stay on.

'Calm down mister, you're frightening the customers!' I heard a male voice behind me,

I I looked over my shoulder and saw a perturbed waiter, a tall fellow standing right behind me; I looked back at her seat, she wasn't there anymore.


© Haim Kadman November the first 2011 " all rights reserved.

© 2011 Haim Kadman

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Added on November 5, 2011
Last Updated on November 5, 2011
Tags: restaurant, dinner, surprise, meeting, dialogue


Haim Kadman
Haim Kadman

Petach-Tikva, Israel

Profile: A few words about myself: being a native of a small country whose waist is seventeen kilometers wide in a certain area; and in seven to eight hours drive one can cross its length, I was amaze.. more..

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