Hidden

Hidden

A Poem by Harrisen Viator
"

Are you, really you?

"
Hidden by your desperate lies,
You live this life that you wish you knew.
Take a look in the mirror,
Is the person staring back, really you?
What about them can you relate?
Broken, cold, and empty inside
You project this false reality as your life.
You want to be who you aren't,
You're running, fighting, your past, this strife.
Just be yourself, nothing more,
Don't put up a front or fight any longer.
I hope you listen to this advice,
But figure it out yourself, and become stronger.

© 2013 Harrisen Viator


Author's Note

Harrisen Viator
Any reviews are welcome, thanks.

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Ees
The second line seems like it could have been written in clearer language. Just a thought, though. You may want to look it over and make sure that it reads as you intended it to.

ahhhh, don't we all want to be who we aren't? Is there really anything we can do? Aren't we all simply who we are?

Nice work. Nice advice. Good job!

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Harrisen Viator

8 Years Ago

Thank you for your review! Yeah, I can understand how that would be confusing for someone reading it.. read more
Ees

8 Years Ago

Haha, that's why I review! Not to tell anybody what to do, but just to think about it, it's what I t.. read more
Harrisen Viator

8 Years Ago

Well, thank you so much! It means a lot and I'll use your review to make myself better.



Reviews

I like this poem not only does it rhyme an make sense. It brings emotional meaning and personal feeling. Like it a lot!!!

Posted 8 Years Ago


Harrisen Viator

8 Years Ago

Thank you!
I'm glad that you like it!
Katherine_Richter47

8 Years Ago

Welcome!
I revised the second line, it used to read, "You live this life you wish you knew."

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 8 Years Ago


[send message][befriend] Subscribe
Ees
The second line seems like it could have been written in clearer language. Just a thought, though. You may want to look it over and make sure that it reads as you intended it to.

ahhhh, don't we all want to be who we aren't? Is there really anything we can do? Aren't we all simply who we are?

Nice work. Nice advice. Good job!

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Harrisen Viator

8 Years Ago

Thank you for your review! Yeah, I can understand how that would be confusing for someone reading it.. read more
Ees

8 Years Ago

Haha, that's why I review! Not to tell anybody what to do, but just to think about it, it's what I t.. read more
Harrisen Viator

8 Years Ago

Well, thank you so much! It means a lot and I'll use your review to make myself better.

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220 Views
3 Reviews
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Added on April 14, 2013
Last Updated on April 14, 2013
Tags: hidden, you, lies, who, broken, cold, strife, life, fighting, listen, yourself, be
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Author

Harrisen Viator
Harrisen Viator

Dallas, TX



About
Twenty years old. Moving forward. soundcloud.com/harrisen-viator more..

Writing