Condensing your words (senryu)

Condensing your words (senryu)

A Poem by hcarson
"

First attempt at senryu thanks to dhimen for explaining...once again lol

"
Condensing your words (senryu)
Condensing your words
No easy task to achieve
Keep heart and believe

© 2016 hcarson


Author's Note

hcarson
All criticisms welcome 😀

My Review

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Featured Review

Deeply meant, the second line compliments the first line so well... It is really hard to condense some words and thoughts of people, that is why the last line is important to have... Well done again mate... Another fabulous start... You are hitting sixes now... Lol...

Sincerely
Dhiman

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Inject Positivity

3 Years Ago

Lol, you are spot on!!! Hehe... Thank you, missed you very much on this site... Very happy to see yo.. read more
hcarson

3 Years Ago

Iam glad to be back and to be excited about things again...i kind of lost all that with college...so.. read more
Inject Positivity

3 Years Ago

We are happy to have you back in our old home again...


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Reviews

Very nice! The message of course. But I also really enjoy that you have maintained the syllable count, while creating three line of equal length.

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Bacchus

3 Years Ago

I agree with S. Mi here... very nice in message, count and lengths of lines. clear yet when somethin.. read more
hcarson

3 Years Ago

Thanks tonyou both, not tried this before so practising,. Both of your comments are extremely apprec.. read more
Deeply meant, the second line compliments the first line so well... It is really hard to condense some words and thoughts of people, that is why the last line is important to have... Well done again mate... Another fabulous start... You are hitting sixes now... Lol...

Sincerely
Dhiman

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Inject Positivity

3 Years Ago

Lol, you are spot on!!! Hehe... Thank you, missed you very much on this site... Very happy to see yo.. read more
hcarson

3 Years Ago

Iam glad to be back and to be excited about things again...i kind of lost all that with college...so.. read more
Inject Positivity

3 Years Ago

We are happy to have you back in our old home again...

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2 Reviews
Rating
Added on August 7, 2016
Last Updated on August 7, 2016

Author

hcarson
hcarson

cardiff, barry, United Kingdom



About
I have an interest in writing short stories and poetry in some shape or form apparently since coming here! Being a mother of five means I have no end of inspiration! I'm an animal lover and have an Am.. more..

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