The Life and Times of Billy Delbrougne

The Life and Times of Billy Delbrougne

A Story by [Happy Alligator Sex]




            Billy Delbrougne awoke in the midst of a Cialis commercial. In his lap lay the remains of a home-made Nachos-Grande, which was now in his ever swelling belly.
            Billy’s eyes popped open- his face was a blocked tooth grimace haloed by a ring of dried flakey Nacho Cheese.
            As he awoke he kicked out, striking and overthrowing the small table he had set out during his dinner, that a second ago had been a stable and seemingly infallible, everlasting resting place for his two and one-half finished beers, which now flew through the air, suspended in his eyes, spewing their contents all over his s**t-hole apartment.
If you experience an erection lasting more than two hours, seek immediate medical attention
S**t………… f**k…….”
Billy hadn’t had an erection for more than four hours. What was the cause of this distress?
Billy had had a dream in which the world was ending, and though it could’ve been stopped, people were shopping for Old Navy clothing.
An alien race invaded Earth, and they scurried around, indefinable grey blurs of color, shooting their toxic-laser emitting eyes vaporizing every Old Navy conesuer in sight. But all the people Billy saw in his dream, as if he had been watching this catastrophe occur on T.V., just continued smiling big white perfect smiles as they strolled around in designer clothing at ridiculously low prices. A pretty Asian woman wearing a bright multi-colored turtle-neck, and a pretty cream skirt, with a sheik imitation leather hand bag, smiled her terrible white smile to a passing black man wearing a pink polo shirt, over his shoulders a light sky blue sweat-shirt was draped and tied neatly below his chin, and fin khaki cargo pants. Suddenly a blur of grey ran by them, and two bright flashes flew from the top of the creature, to the Asian woman’s head, immediately vaporizing her. Her white teeth and gums fell to the pristine sidewalk, like a pair of dentures. The black man continued on his walk to the next Old Navy store, as the camera panned away.
From a low aerial view Billy could see the makings of a giant strip-mall, each with a bright rainbow colored tent overhanging the sidewalk, on which thousands, no millions maybe billions of shoppers strolled amongst the destructive alien force. These aliens were short. So short that if one approached, Billy was sure that anyone over two feet tall could squash one beneath his or her feet. But no. Every one wanted the clothes.
The camera panned back to the side walk where more people of all races (so the commercial would not seem racist) mingled entering and exiting the shops with endless baggage. Two identical perfect blonde little twins skipped past Billy’s vantage point, hand in hand both wearing the exact same blue sweat shirt and khakis. A blur of grey, and their teeth landed on the sidewalk. Two pair of perfect white dentures.
Billy saw the same thing again and again, yet no one would stop and try to defend themselves or even run, or even acknowledge this attack.
Stop! Run please! RUN! Billy screamed to no avail.
His camera panned out to epic proportions. He saw the world laid out like a Social Studies map, from thousands of feet above. All over the Earth he saw flashy pin-points of sick green, and soon, soon very soon, the earth was littered with white. The camera panned back now with nauseating speed to earth. Billy could not close his eyes now. Billy could not scream. He could only watch in nauseating horror as he came upon a pair of teeth. The world: a sea of white, perfect teeth. Teeth of those who eat, and s**t in the same place. The teeth of those who care not for their own demise. Teeth of those who would rather have the latest than the lasting.
The camera turned to find a grey blur shimmering in front of it. An alien. These aliens did not run at break neck speeds! They simply shimmered. The grey man moved what belly assumed to be his head to the left, the right. It extended its neck, or what Billy believed to be his neck, down to the camera. Billy saw terrible green eyes, and dark tan brown, glistening slimy skin, and what’s that? A grin; a toothless grin of amusement? YUP! Then the Earth was a flash of bright sick green, and then Billy had awakened, eyes still adjusting from the bright burning green to black of his living-room.
Billy’s heart pounded.
A siren went off… a gun shot…
Time slipped by… so… slowly.
Billy could feel the Earth tick around on its invisible axis.
Billy could feel the sun creep slowly through the ozone… burning…
Billy screamed allowed. Who the hell was that? He stood, ignoring the spilled dinner. Suddenly his tiny apartment seemed huge in the shadows where something lurked. Something more terrible than all the monsters and evil little laser eyed aliens in all of anything. The monster was called Apathy. It smelled of burning flesh and hair and blood and sweat, and gunpowder and new shoes and clothes and gasoline. And more.
Billy was nearly in tears. There was a disease…. there was a fire… there was a flood… there was a cloud… there was ice… there was darkness… there was man, on top of it all wearing spiffy-a*s khakis, and a polo shirt.
“What?” Billy asked his empty apartment, his upper lip quivering, tears rolling down his cheeks to his lips and neck.
Billy perspired.
A new thing came to him. A man, a white angry, screaming man appeared behind Billy’s mind. The man’s eyes bulged; his neck and face were rattled with veins, spittle flew form his mouth, and he was pointing behind him at a screen that showed a map. On this map little dashed lines crossed from one half of a hemisphere to another. North to south, south to east and north and more and more. There were red dots at the end of these dashed yellow lines, and Billy could see more and more lines streak lazily across the screen to land in a soft sturdy un-flickering red dot.
The man in the suit was still screaming, though Billy knew not of what he spoke. The man was screaming at others in front of him. Over the man hung a heavy ceremonial flag. Billy felt the man. The man now felt like a kid again, fighting with others, and for once he realized that his flag meant nothing really, because all the other angry suited men in the world toward whom the angry man’s yellow line now flew and who’s yellow lines now curved toward him, all felt the same, thought the same, were the same.
Then, the man was gone in a bright light, along with Billy’s view. The light would shine for years to come.
Now Billy was on his knees, on a pool of beer.
“No… please god…please…” he sobbed.
He felt something coming again.
Now Billy was outside… the ground was hard and bare, and the sun did not shine, yet the sky was bright and a flame with a sick red, unnatural glow.
             Before Billy lay a book. The book was called: HISTORY 3000-3000 (subtitled) B.C.E to A.C.E
            Billy looked down. The book was opened to page 1009, not even the middle of the book. The heading read:
After the Plague
The plague is believed to have began around 2012, with a never before encountered virus that in it’s first few months alone decreased the population from it’s already staggering numbers to even lower by at least 75%. (For details on nuclear war II see chapters 3-7)
The wind blew the pages to chapters 3-7.
Billy read about the short-lived nations in North America, and their relations with the rest of the world. Things had not been according to the book. Millions died as a result of being vaporized by nuclear explosions. The rest had died from the after affects. Then the rest had died due to the disease.
Then the wind blew the pages again, this time to page 3019. Billy read a detailed description of the life and last moments of the last mammal on the Planet Earth. The small rodent had been alone, of course, in a hostile world of heat, and bugs. Hideous things with many legs, and huge bodies. This new world order was a regime of hungry meat eaters who loved soft fury mammal meat to their normal exoskeletons of fellow insects. The book Billy gazed in to even had full colored glossy photos of the cute little
Creature as it met a huge hungry spider like monstrosity. The last remnants of who had believed themselves immortal was gone. The closest link to a short time of industry and hate, over. Think of the accomplishments Billy! THINK! The only things on this earth so far to kill simply out of difference! The first to use technology to f**k up the world considerable! Billy! You should be proud!
             Billy was not proud. He wanted to discharge the Nachos and beer all over this dreadful book, in this dreadful cold windy future. Billy did spew. He felt hard half digested nacho chips coming up his throat, and closed his eyes and wretched. He opened his eyes to see his ugly green living room rug, covered in semi digested Nachos Grande and Beer. And was that breakfast’s scrambled eggs also? I do believe so!
            “Why?” Billy asked his empty apartment, “Why ...why me?”
You shall see Billy D oh Billy D you shall see…
            Billy felt something again.
Billy saw the earth. He sees the Milky Way. Billy sees the burned cities, and the wastelands of his earth. He is sad. Then, he sees something amazing, like watching a flower open and close its pedals in fast motion. Billy sees the waste lands green a little. The nuclear winter comes to an end. Billy sees small protozoan’s form in water. Billy sees the oceans fill with micro organisms; Billy sees them change to bugs, fish, amphibians, lizards, dinosaurs again, then, low and behold mammals: mice looking things, bear looking things. He sees the furred mammals withstand a climate change while a meter in his head counts on so fast he cannot discern the identity of the numbers as they spin up and down like on his alarm clock. The new world order of mammals suddenly walks like Billy. Homes form. Villages form Cities form. Cities are destroyed with bombs. Then the cycle repeats itself, which is too much for Billy. Billy screams and screams to the people to stop and think, and to look to the past to no avail. Then he realizes something more disturbing. He is now going backwards in time. He sees China, the Great wall disappears, and then a war torn city more modern than Billy’s cities today, take the Great Wall’s place. Then the cycle continues back. Billy realizes this has been since the beginning, and will continue till the sun explodes and the Milky Way is no more. What about the others, the other galaxies, the universe? It truly is a vicious cycle.
Billy awakes again for the last time. He is tired now and he lays on his back in his own Vomit. He stands. What do I do? Thinks Billy. I cannot do a thing and no one or not enough will listen to me. Billy realizes how small he and we really are. He debates for a moment… then he remembers that his apartment is on the 19th floor. He smiles.
The glass broke easier than expected. The night air is cool and clear. The city lights are bright. Billy smiles cause all is well and… well… nothing really matters anymore to him. He couldn’t handle the truth… and that’s fine with him. At least he has come to terms with the Universe, and hears the most beautiful thing he’s ever heard, as he rushes toward concrete.
Billy died on November 19th of 2007. Every one else did soon after.
Billy could not handle a look into the truth. Whatever, whoever showed him this killed him? If confronted with the same journey could you? Could you try to spread what you know during your short life, or, let it go?
Here lies Billy Delbrougne: Everything was good, and nothing hurt at all. 

© 2008 [Happy Alligator Sex]

Author's Note

[Happy Alligator Sex]
dont care i know its bad

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Added on February 8, 2008


[Happy Alligator Sex]
[Happy Alligator Sex]

i am very pleased to meet you... but i dont like strangers... big smelly doo doo head what poops a lot squirley m**********r handsome???(shesays) weak tired screamer in love very... strange? cube:fore.. more..