Weather Beaten

Weather Beaten

A Poem by icelandicblue

Life clouds my vision
all I see is cold drizzle
washing me
away.

© 2014 icelandicblue


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Reviews

I very much like this. The placement of "away" adds to it.

Posted 6 Years Ago


icelandicblue

6 Years Ago

Thanks so much.
Love the demise to the very last, small word...cleverly done, enjoyed x

Posted 6 Years Ago


icelandicblue

6 Years Ago

Appreciate that Poppy.
A shorter piece from you. Have you been washed away toward the end? I really enjoyed the effect of the word "away" being smaller than the rest.

Posted 6 Years Ago


icelandicblue

6 Years Ago

thank you- there are times where being washed away sounds very inviting.
I think we all know this feeling all to well; yet, you have managed to rise above the feeling to write this short and succinct senryu. It is replete with melancholy.

Very nicely written.

Posted 6 Years Ago


icelandicblue

6 Years Ago

Thank you Linda.
Very nice job with this short form, Anne. I like the way you have made the "away" a bit smaller than the other words to emphasize your meaning. You are a very talented poet!

Posted 6 Years Ago


icelandicblue

6 Years Ago

Thanks Joyce and you are too kind!
Open your heart where clouds are parted at your command.
Paint the vision behind the lids embrace of your vision and see what you desire.
Hold this vision in the protection of your soul until it becomes your reality.

You have exposed this gloom and it no longer holds power over you. You are the light overcoming the darkness. You are the warmth on a dreary day.

Sending you only love and light.

Posted 6 Years Ago


icelandicblue

6 Years Ago

Thank you David for that beautiful message.
I really like the first line, "Life clouds my vision." It is a great line. Though this is a short poem, it has so many meanings and so much emotion behindd it. It is a very good poem.

Posted 6 Years Ago


icelandicblue

6 Years Ago

Thank you PoetryPenPal, this is a type of poetry called a Senryu it is the cousin to the Japanese Ha.. read more
PoetryPenPal

6 Years Ago

Oh, cool! Your welcome!
the title drew me in and i am glad. ejoyed this. a small vessel, but full. just the way i like them.

Posted 6 Years Ago


icelandicblue

6 Years Ago

Thank you for reading and the comment.
Short, simple, yet terrifyingly cold...:)

Posted 6 Years Ago


icelandicblue

6 Years Ago

Thanks Gleb, just put on another sweater!
Gleb Zavlanov

6 Years Ago

:D. I will.
Like winter weather, Life has its seasons of wearing us down. Remember that Spring is never too far away, Blue...

Posted 6 Years Ago


icelandicblue

6 Years Ago

Thanks Rita, I will.

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Added on January 6, 2014
Last Updated on January 6, 2014

Author

icelandicblue
icelandicblue

Boston



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I do not accept any new friend requests unless we have read and commented on each others poetry. No exceptions. I have enough homework as it is. I expect reciprocity in our exchanges. Read my work and.. more..

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