Murmur Sweet

I found myself upon a road
an adventure it might be,
and so that day I followed it
a girl both wild and free.

I saw the wildlife watching
to see where I might go,
I knew not yet my travel plans
feeling a bit like old Thoreau.

And as the sun reached up
to take his place on high,
I looked up to feel the grace
that filled the cobalt sky.

A tree then did invite me
to rest beneath her bough,
so feeling quite fatigued
I slept there for a while.

And when I did awaken
refreshed I felt anew
and knew the road I'd taken
did more than just pass through.

it was a journey pure
both body and in spirit
my heart began to murmur sweet
and I could finally hear it.

Reviews

[Bright Ocean Star]

ice, this is wonderful wordplay, my friend. I really like it a lot, but the rhyme scheme in the fourth stanza is a bit off. It is a small thing, however, and easily fixed. The rest of it sounds lovely. I especially love "As the sun reached up/to take his place on high/I looked up to feel the grace/that filled the cobalt sky." If words were a paintbrush, this would be a DaVinci. Beautiful.

[icelandicblue]

Ah thanks so much. I have worked on that 4th stanza and will give it another go. I appreciate your candor and your kind words.

[SquinklaPsyOps]

The part that I like about, is that as I read it, I could see images flowing, and I think you did a good creative structure of words that convey that feeling.

[icelandicblue]

Thank you I am glad that you liked it.

[Ruth]

This is so cleansing and refreshing. Like a new finding within - time out where the heart can be heard once again - beautiful! x

[icelandicblue]

Thank you for your kind words Poppy.

[Ruth]

My pleasure! :)

[Lyn Anderson]

This is a wonderful piece. It gives a positive feeling of meditation in nature.

[icelandicblue]

Thank you so much. I appreciate that.

[MAD ENGLISHMAN]

Love this poem. I can imagine a simple stroll down a country lane just to recharge my batteries. Lovely imagery yet again. In my library for this one.

[icelandicblue]

Why I thank you kind sir!

[Rita L. Sev]

Right into my library to be uplifted by your words again. This is an enchanting poem, Blue - love it!

[icelandicblue]

Thanks so much Rita, I'm honored.

[Baby Ricochet]

Quite a lovely poem blue. Good flow and rhymes too.

[icelandicblue]

Thank you BR. You never fail to leave a kind word on my poems.

[Roger Turgeon]

While I enjoyed this pleasant journey I was hoping the Stanza ....

A tree then did invite me
to rest beneath her boughs,
feeling quite fatigued
I slept there for a while.

... had a consistent rhyme scheme. I'm such a rhymer I would have preferred the word "sky" to "skies" as well.

But in the end.....nice

[icelandicblue]

Thank you I appreciate it.

[♔ CrownedDevil &#..]

Such a wonderful piece, brilliantly written. :-)

Kaze~

[icelandicblue]

You are always so sweet Kaze.

[♔ CrownedDevil ☾]

Your very welcome. :-)

[MsJewel]

I love the soft flow and gorgeous rhyme - not forced at all....just absolutely lovely. But most of all, I really love the feeling your poem left me with - quite uplifting - which I needed today!

:) Julie

[icelandicblue]

Thanks so much Julie. I am really pleased that you liked the poem and its message.