In Lieu of Sunny Days

Sunshine on my pillow makes me happy

In Lieu of Sunny Days

By jack

 

I wake to find the ripples of a distant weeping light

Forces fed of clouded skies come showering this night

Drenched among the tepid dreams, misfortune brings the storm

Buried deep in thoughtless sound, of all this world hath born

 

Though I shall stand before this sky astonished in its view

Wading in a pool of hope and faith long overdue

Facing that so terrible, awash its torrid gaze

To cast it far beyond my reach in lieu of sunny days

Author's Note

Written for Helena's Blue Rose Cafe TOVLI'S TEN poetry contest

Reviews

[s y e]

Wow, all of your work is beautifully written and blows me away.

The first line was amazing.

"I wake to find the ripples of a distant weeping light"

Wow, you have once again, blown me away

[Jack...]

Thank you so much my sweet friend

[Mehak Mushtaq]

How beautiful is it. :)

[Jack...]

Thank you

[Veronica Chandler]

I enjoyed this piece very much and the ending line "In lieu of sunny days" really capped it off perfectly. I tried to find the rules for the contest, but I couldn't. But I don't think I need to because I know what I like and this definitely qualifies!

[Jack...]

Thanks so much Veronica. The contest was a month ago I think, I just had this piece and not too many people had read it, so I brought it back up again.

[Baby Ricochet]

The first line is absolutely gorgeous. Jack my friend sometimes when I read your work and think about my own I feel like a regular Philistine.

[Jack...]

Thank you sir

[Souladareatease]

I Loved this, Very finite work!!!

[Jack...]

Thanks so much, I appreciate you stopping by

[quinfinn]

you know, i worked in the naval shipyard for 7 years, and we always used to say "in lieu of" this that or the other...you have made me smile very big with this one. not just with that phrase but with your considerable wit and writing skill. well done.

[Jack...]

Quinn, I always appreciate your kind and informative words

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Jack my love, I adore your way of spinning a web of words, well done, good read.

[Jack...]

Thanks so much

[Eileenws]

You did an excellent job of incorporating all the words into a poem. For some reason it reminds me of an Alison Kraus song. Nicely done.

[Jack...]

Thank you so much. I appreciate your kind thoughts.

[Helena]

"I wake to find the ripples of a distant weeping light". I just knew when I read that line it would lead me into a world of poetic beauty. Very lovely Jack. Thank you.

[Jack...]

Thank you, it was fun to write. Besides, you provided the main words, I just arranged them and added a little filler.

[WingsToFly]

wow, well done! :) 'distant weeping light' nice one.

[Jack...]

Thanks so much. It was fun to write esspecially since today it is cloudy and drizzling where I am.