Twilight storm

Early in the morning

and I can't sleep

What is this fog

Hanging over me

 

Its the burdens bear

The truths be known

What are we doing here

Standing all alone

 

If you whipser in my ear

I'll hear your heart

You've emotion to give

Lets begin with the start

 

Move closer,

Closer to me

Beat the beating

Make a step

A beat box melody

A romantic greeting

 

Forget what they say

You and me that count

Feel this storm pass

We'll wrong their doubt

 

High above the clouds

I can see our fate

Whether we make it

Is at your pace

 

Move closer

Closer to me

Smile the smiling

Paint a painting

A childs artwork

Or mastered styling

 

It's nearly midnight

And I can't sleep

Where is the storm

That once drowned me?

 

You're the sunshine

That will overlook

And guard me everytime

Reviews

[Ees]

I enjoy the images that you create. Especially the fog hanging over you. The beatbox melody is fantastic too!
I really enjoyed reading this poem. The second stanza might need a look-over because it didn't seem to fit the language of the rest of the poem and was not as concise. It wasn't bad, but you may want to have a peek at it and make sure that it reads the way that you want it to.
Lovely work overall. Great job.

[Goo]

For the chances we lost
Rays shine through
Do we remain overcast
Or find the bright blue

OR....

To open the eyes
Be a sinful delight
What more can we ask
But the chance of light

[Ees]

They are both nice.
The choice is always yours. I think I like the second choice, myself though.

[Goo]

Thank you for your comments :)