In Love With Nothing

A man realizes even that his most basic desires lead him to the core truth of all existence.

     I have died a million deaths, and I will die a million more. Her breasts were pushed together inside a low cut dress exactly one size too small. But I was not looking at her breasts. I was looking at her cleavage, the space between them made entirely out of nothing. And when her pink lips moved to speak I did not look at them either-- just the deep nothingness they surrounded. I longed for the empty space at the top of her thighs, and I knew that it was there that I wanted to be most of all, to die again for the millionth and first time. Nothingness thou art, and unto nothingness thou shalt return. Again, and again, and again, until thou hast realized eternal nothingness, Ein Sof, complete integration, where all boundaries disappear and the self is lost in a sweet oblivion from whence springs all.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked.

"Nothing," I said.

"Men always say that."

"Some of us mean it."

     And she tipped her wine glass to the emptiness between her lips, and she did not take her bottomless pupils from mine, and we saw each other's nothingness, which was the same nothingness, and we knew we were always one, in life and death, with or without ceremonies, rites, or spells.

Reviews

[Barbara Walker]

I enjoyed reading this very much! I appreciate your point of view!