daydream

01/2012

I've pushed through the weeping branches

that grow out of the foliage surrounding your heart, 

I've stood among the yellow aspens and red maples 

that grow within our dusty memories, 

from time to time I've walked the beaten paths 

winding to and from certain moments

portrayed on these frayed pages, 

hoping to catch a glimpse of you, in a memory perhaps

somewhere forgotten, 

I will wait for you

Author's Note

Thanks to Emily Burns for helping with the format.

Reviews

[Tristan]

The imagery your words evoke is simply delightful: they have lots of texture, and the sound of nature with them. You use words in a deceptively simple way and it shows no sign of forced appearance; everything fits. I do believe, however, that this poem could benefit from being broke up - all of the commas and no periods to break it into sentences makes you feel as if you have to read it all in one breath. But other than that, wonderful work.

[PetiteGemini]

I can feel your longing for her and wanting her back as you go through all of the memories you and her have had together. Very well done.

[EMF]

Beautiful and with such hope. Brilliant job with wonderful imagry and feeling. A true perfection

[Alana McGuire]

This is really really lovely. And I really like how it goes so well with the picture. Fall is my favorite, so this stands out to me even more. :)

[Priscilla Sayers]

Beautifully written. A day dream indeed that paints the lovely image of autumn and hope.

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

a heart tug of a word painting~ gorgeous use of colors that create a sorroundscape of variant sensory inputs~

[Muse]

You've created some fantastic imagery with this writing. Great stuff Josh..I luved it.

[Casper]

Very beautiful.

[Lily Mae]

This just kissed my brow and filled my heart.. so beautiful Josh.xo

[Kaylor Mason]

This is elegant and really clever--the way you use the autumn forest as a parallel for someone's life, or memories or mind . . . that's really good. I think the picture fits well too. "I will wait for you" . . . as with practically all literature, the last few words makes it or breaks it. This last line caps it off perfectly in one heartfelt statement.