The Watcher

The Watcher

A Story by jrlowe

Short short story about a dream

The view before me played out like an interactive performance on a stage. There I stood in complete control watching myself, acting out meaningless scenes. Standing there as a spectator would, mildly amused at the frivolity that served as entertainment for a bored mind waiting for consciousness to arise. No, the real point of interest was the pair of eyes watching me intently from the sidelines
It started as a small tickle, a feeling that I was being watched. The observer being observed. The sensation grew stronger with each passing moment until the urge to direct my attention became more alluring then the scene before me starring myself.
The source of the uncomfortable itch appeared to be short in stature obscured in the shroud of the dim lighting a kin to that of a theater. The feeling smacked of standing in a darkened theater watching a show, while someone interested less in the performance on the stage, then you scrutinized your every move.
In the gloom the diminutive figure had two noticeable features, a couple of enormous ears and eyes that glowed. So comical did he seem that had it not been for the memorizing gaze of my watcher, his appearance would have inspired a burst of bubbling laughter. So intense was his stare that it gave oneself an overwhelming feeling that becoming lost quickly was inevitable. A jolt of fear coursed through my mind, swiftly followed by annoyance at being bothered, only to be replaced with curiosity. What did the creature want? One did not necessarily get the immediate sense of good or evil emanating from his general direction. It was anyone’s guess. That being the case there was only one thing left to do.
“What do you want?” I asked in a most level voice. Surprise flashed through the creature’s glowing eyes before stoicism was restored. Was that possibly a hint of annoyance I saw mixed in at being discovered himself? And then the half expected happened, he vanished leaving me in a state of wonder.

© 2010 jrlowe

Author's Note

please ignore grammar problems, not my strongest suit. What do you think of the piece?

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You have a really good niche and do it well. I like the suspense, intrigue, and mystery all rolled into one.

Posted 9 Years Ago

Is a good clever poem ...I like it..keep writing what pops into your head and you will do well :)

Posted 9 Years Ago

Very interesting story based on your dream. The creature, what ever it was, acted just like a supernatural creature would when discovered. I like how you turned your dream into a story, great job.

Posted 9 Years Ago

A good exercise in thick description. Was this a dream that you had? The ending makes it seem like a cliff hanger. As a reader there's little I can take away from it. You do have a talent for word choice and descriptive language. Keep writing!

Posted 9 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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4 Reviews
Added on November 7, 2010
Last Updated on November 7, 2010




A wife and mother finding her voice though prose. I started writing when I was young (6 or 7 years of age), mostly fictional stories. Poetry has never been my strong suit but a few years ago it stru.. more..

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