The Last Pain to Suffer

The Last Pain to Suffer

When shall ever the pain content?

That I know, for fact, it's plenty.

See the result of what I meant.
At last, I could rise to be me.

From the endless grinding inside my heart
To the shivering of my moral senses,
All I ask but a simple part.
Of the treasures by my own expenses.

No matter how many times one saves another,
One stays a killer to remain.
No matter how many times I try to be no bother,
All my effort prove to be in vain.

When shall ever the pain content?
That I know for fact, it's plenty.
And, I see why I've been sent.
I could start, at last, to be free.

Author's Note

Just want to have a general idea of what people think of this. Moreover, I would like to be to express myself more truthfully through this form of art, so any advice on what to improve on would be more than wonderful! Thank you.

Reviews

[Nightfeather]

Pain is a burden that people must carry in their hearts but the weight can be overwhelming for some, because they did not wish for the pain but is it really alright that we humans must know pain in order to become strong and survive in this word that is more and more leaning to the darkness?

Your poem would become sleeker if you just place it on the standard white background, for my attention swayed for some moments because of the gray background. If you want people to focus more on your poem and not on the decoration, try to decorate your words or if you want to share us a powerful message or story in form of a poem, a photo may be included in your poem to give us a mental image.

You have talent and if you keep writing, you will become a great writer. Wait, you already are, for you are not giving up on writing and want honest feedback to become better. That is the real writer spirit. Never stop writing, for your talent would go to waste and I would be sad for your thoughts must be shared with the world.

Good job :D