Fatalistic

Never say never

 

Fatalistic

 

You won’t, you will never, you’ll not…

Such a fatal way of thinking.

suicide in words, in thoughts, in memory.

Broken promises, shattered hopes line a path like broken glass

that snag upon the hem of silken hope I carry.

 

Moving along, barefoot-slowly

each step careful and apprehensive

for with each step

yet another sliver burrows deep within

my sole.

 

He won’t, He will never, He’s not…

Fatal thoughts ingrained

conditioned

brainwashed by others to give me hope-

Hope…faith…my trail of breadcrumbs they left for me to follow.

 

I will

I’m going to

not right now

maybe tomorrow

maybe someday

I promise.

 

Words echo sharp over time

they come at me from the side,

pelting my ankles with shards

and I brush them away with a slight move of my foot.

Some appear from behind and I shudder at the sound

close my eyes, and move on…slowly mindful of my step

afraid of what I may dredge up should I dig in with my heels

afraid of the pain I could inflict upon myself.

 

I won’t, I will never, I’m not…

Fatalistic unrealistic thoughts

a vague prediction of what is expected,

of what I’ve always known.

Never have I felt the softness of earth

Never have my toes touched water

leaving footprints in sand…

though I know I’ve felt it’s tease upon my arch-

I think…

 

For many years I’ve followed this downtrodden trail

I bear the scars, skin calloused, and numb

as cracked as the shards that I tread upon

that I would not recognize peace if I ever were to stumble upon it-

 

Yet…

 

You will, you’ll always, you are…

tomorrow

every day

you promise…

 

a diverging trail of words I follow

soon after I stumble

you are there to catch me.  

 

 

Reviews

[Glen Yumang Manese]

Bluntly truthful with the lines here...
the passage just as you read this ---
as a reader gives much the agony for which is present ---
I was pulled in --- again like the style for which you bring this to light...
makes for a compelling form for which the viewer is in there with you...

[Wynter Ignatius]

"I will
I’m going to
not right now
maybe tomorrow
maybe someday
I promise."

Every line I've said in relation to various things in my life. This one takes me so many places, some even I will not talk about at this time still that I don't know where to begin nor do I believe my words can accurately give credence too. This is something to be proud of Julie - keep it up.

[Audrey Howitt]

Wow--liked this a bunch! Great imagery--and a great feel to it--

[B.S. Scarpa]

this poem has alot of imagery in it. It makes the reader feel what you are saying. good job!!