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Going Under

Going Under

A Poem by Kay/Hayden
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Trapped in a bathtub or imagination?

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I watch as the water corners my shoulders and slowly creeps up my neck. I feel my lungs loose air, it's such a bare to stay afloat. The chains narrow around my wrists. My chest feels like an arrow drove through it. I try to squint my eyes to read the tiny print on the wall across the blank room. “It’s okay Max, just calm down. You're just in the surgery room. Your anesthesia didn’t work,” a distant voice said.I feel a prick in my arm, then my body sinks into the darkness of a mattress.

© 2020 Kay/Hayden


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Reviews

This is my biggest fear! I also fear dreams from going under. It’s such a weird experience isn’t it? A way to understand what death my feel like I guess. I really like this!

Posted 1 Month Ago


Kay/Hayden

1 Month Ago

Thanks so much, Courtney! Always love your poems!
Very good use of description. You made the reader feel and understand the place you were in. Thank you Kay/Hayden for sharing the amazing poem.
Coyote

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Kay/Hayden

1 Month Ago

Thanks so much for the feedback!
Coyote Poetry

1 Month Ago

You are welcome Kay/Hayden.
I agree with Laz. Would like the story of happened before and after.
I remember the last time I was put to sleep for a surgery...I started counting backward and knew afterward the exact number and moment I went under...I could feel myself going and saying to myself, here I go.
But how awful that feeling if it doesn't work...a stream of consciousness about losing consciousness.
j.

Posted 1 Month Ago


Kay/Hayden

1 Month Ago

Ya I could not imagine, thank you for the feedback! Got inspiration for this poem from my own foot s.. read more
This reminds me of when I got stuffed into a huge noisy magnetic resonance tube, to catch an image prior to neck surgery. I'm not scared of much, but that was scary & at the same time I summoned superhuman control to keep from freaking out. Whenever I feel like I'm freaking out, I think back to being crammed in a cold screaming tube & I know I can do anything, forevermore. Your description is similar to that kind of freaking out & trying to stay in control, that we find in a million different kinds of life situations (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 2 Months Ago


Kay/Hayden

2 Months Ago

Thanks for taking the time to review! Love, Kay
Nice use of descriptive details and dialogue. You could extend this and turn it into a short story. What happens later? What happened before?
Good job, keep it up!

Posted 2 Months Ago



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5 Reviews
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Added on November 23, 2020
Last Updated on November 23, 2020
Tags: Trapped

Author

Kay/Hayden
Kay/Hayden

Canton, OH



About
Hi! I am a 13-year-old aspiring author who is a proud nonbinary! I go by Kay or Hayden (Your choice). I support all people and am always here for you! Love yourself kiddos! more..

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