WAR IN PEACE

01 17 11

A landscape baking
in black war's sauna
may as well be left alone
for there is nothing to confirm
in smoke but shadows

The clear aftermath
offers clear human forms
some solid enough for statistics
some liquefied enough to suggest
a cemetery is in fact
a flesh garden

Numb  to sense
they may very well be
yet they snuff out the silence
so unbearably abstract
in the wake of authorized
pandemonium
replacing it with a moral
in the ringing ears of those
arriving to assess

After the advance and retreat
there is still a landscape
for a general to ride
a lofty tank into and lament
as an emperor did
on a compensating horse
so many green advances before

Author's Note

-Something for Remembrance Day in Canada and Veterans' Day in the U.S.

-A few years ago I decided I was going to read War And Peace...
just so I could say I did it. I hated most of it but I got it done.

Reviews

[The Random Writings Of ..]

The first two stanza's of this piece are so powerful you can smell the imagery that is being set up for the piece.
"The clear aftermath
offers clear human forms
some solid enough for statistics
some liquefied enough to suggest
a cemetery is in fact
a flesh garden"
The use of the word liquefied - dominates the sentence and flows to the flesh garden. It gives me tingles... I have goose bumps!!!
The descriptions moving forward are a tale of the aftermath - an awakening of what was - flowing nicely together.
After the first two stanza's the rest of the piece winds down to end I would say on a more peaceful note.
You always surprise me my friend. I don't think I have ever read anyone's work who is as diversified as yours :) When I get your read requests, it's like a box of chocolates, I never know what I am going to get! I love every piece of chocolate!
Oh I have to comment on your authors note - the fact that you read War and Peace just so you could say you did - and hated it, but got though it, brought a smile to my face! To cute!

[kublakhan27]

Wow, I don't think I've ever gotten an endorsement of that magnitude before :) Thank you Kate...that means a lot...I just hope I can continue to surprise you :)

This one got a LOT of tinkering before I was able to capture that progression you speak of lol And yes, I'm thankful that all novels aren't that long...it was certainly it's 200-some-odd pages of history that inspired this and not the 900-some-odd pages of soap operas :D

[The Random Writings Of Me..Kates]

Lol I hear that! You have great work, and I don't think your surprises will cease! Keep writing! I can't wait to see what's next :)

[kublakhan27]

lol thanks again Kate, I can't wait myself ;)

[Caradoc]

The last stanza of this one brings everything into perspective. We repeat the mistakes of the past, too selfish or too ignorant to care.

We humans are a curious species are we not? We build our towers tall, only to tear them them down and start anew. Our short lives are the very definition of madness it seems...

A chilling piece to read my friend.

-Caradoc

[kublakhan27]

Perhaps the most chilling fact of all is that many of our greatest technological advancements and evolutions have been borne of war, not just negative ones but positive ones as well. We spay and neuter pets to control their population, and it almost feels like war is our way of controlling the human population. And for the soldiers that survive, many of them are haunted for life by the traumas inflicted on them by the carnage they were witness to, or in some cases, a contributor to. Thank you my friend for sharing your thoughts.

[Caradoc]

It would seem that way. True, we lose our fair share to sickness and natural disasters, as do other animals, but there is nothing above us in the food chain, nothing to keep our numbers in check. Our greatest threat is each other. From a certain, cold point of view, war is logical...

You are welcome. Keep writing.

[kublakhan27]

I agree all the way my friend...these are all cold, hard realities that you speak of.

[icelandicblue]

History repeats and repeats the mode of transportation and weapons change but generals still arrive to view the aftermath. Your imagery is taut and vivid. I'm impressed by the poem and the fact that you read War and Peace! Wow for you.

[kublakhan27]

They certain do, after the damage has been done. I'm glad it resonated with you, and thank you for the wow as well haha

[s y e]

This reminds me of some of the amazing poems we have been reading in school - war related of course. Poets such as Wilfred Owen, Rupert Brooke, Siegfried Sassoon; this poem is up there with them all. It's amazing bud.

[kublakhan27]

That is some incredible praise Noodlebop, it means the world to hear you say that...thanks so much :) I may have had those writers in mind when I wrote this.

[quinfinn]

authorized pandemonium....love that! this piece is electric and forceful, well done! and yes, Tolstoy is both arduous and ho-hum to read.....congrats on the self inflicted abuse!

[kublakhan27]

Haha thank you so much for the compliments, and for understanding my pain :)

[Mark Anthony Games (Hum..]

War in Peace
(Review for Change the World Competition) I gave a perfect 10 for both art and craft. This is a very cleaver and well constructed work. This was the 18th piece I reviewed and the first to make me think I had missed a category, imagery. Would have to award a perfect 10 for that too. Very very good entry, thank you for submitting it.

[kublakhan27]

Thank you so much for the positive words, that means a lot^^

[Mark Anthony Games (Hum..]

Elements of Wilfred Owen here, Great imagery, great construction. Like the line 'as an emperor did on a compensating horse'. Another strong entry into the Change the World competition.

[kublakhan27]

Thanks very much, I'm pretty sure I had Owen in mind when I was writing this one^^

[Epipsychologist]

Great poem. I like how you begin with the uncertainty in the shadows of the smoke and the painful certainties that follow (like body counts).

[kublakhan27]

Thanks very much^^

[B-poet]

Wow this is great poem. I love how you put it all together. The words create the imagery in the mind of the reader. This is apart of your style. Keep perfecting that and the skies are the limit for you dear friend. Great write. :)

[kublakhan27]

Thanks so much, your compliments are very inspiring :)

[MOON]

Great word choice , poignant write .

[kublakhan27]

Many thanks^^