RAIN SOME LECTURE ON ME

RAIN SOME LECTURE ON ME

A Poem by kublakhan27
"

01 04 11

"
I took the liberty of slurping up
the quiver on your gloriously clammy shoulder
My tongue was on the way there anyway
to quell the quarantine of shared sweat
handed down by my failing air conditioner
(I may have to remind myself
to chew on my next french fry)
No adnauseating hum will tamper
with the beat of our dramatic hips
smacking like exhausted blackboard brushes
in the airy aftermath of schoolyard bustle
Three o' clock sun ignites unprecedented hustle
in recalcitrant schoolboys blanketed
in discipline's dust cloud
Rain some lecture on me if you must
I'll lay out my stomach to put on your pelts
of vocal torrents and unearth my goosebumps
to bloom like fiddleheads of education
Never has a lonely syllable felt
more aware of the melodic subject
of predicated guardian angels

© 2012 kublakhan27


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Hmm.. think! think! think! Okay I'm thinking there is raw passion in there. Untamable passion. Furry skin to be laid on your stomach? Ha! Barbarically gorgeous! Those words are insane but gorgeous at the same time, made me think of Tarzan and Cleopatra fornicating at the conference hall of the White House. If you find this offensive, you're free to delete the comment but it's what came to me after reading the poem. Oh the mind..

Posted 8 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Mary Ann M.

8 Years Ago

LOL Frieda ;P
Frieda P

8 Years Ago

xD
kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

:D



Reviews

This was very cleverly written. Very smart. I love how some words were underlined, gives it more of a 'oomph' to the poem. I loved it!


Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

There was indeed a lot of oomph in my head when I was writing this...I'm glad you like it, thank you.. read more
s y e

8 Years Ago

Anytime, :-)
Another well penned work of art. :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

Thank you Keely :)
most certainly, this is very cleverly worded. i think i'll take a pass on the blackboard regimen, as it sounds rather painful, however...there are certain aspects of this which greatly pique my interest....i.e. licking sweat....oof, i think my tongue just got hard. kinky, stinky, and tastier than a twinkie...i like it!!!!!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

Haha I suppose it's all about balance, but I will say that I didn't write this one with pain in mind.. read more
quinfinn

8 Years Ago

it's always balance, n'est pas? you are welcome!!
kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

Haha It is indeed
You earned your B.A. in English lit with this one, all I can say with any clarity is it's bat shyte crazy good...other than that you're on your own, whilst slurping in the last of your quivery quarantine and the dust of chalkboards. There so many places this could take me, mostly insane, trying to figure you out, I tip my beret again to you, master of adorned sexual frustration.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

Haha it's alright, I knew what you meant...but it still sounded good ;)
Frieda P

8 Years Ago

It figures you would ;-)
kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

Of course ;D
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TLK
No adnauseating hum will tamper
with the beat of our dramatic hips
smacking like exhausted blackboard brushes
in the airy aftermath of schoolyard bustle

Yes, yes, yes, oh teach me until I am a dripping pool of knowledge. Saturate me with chapters.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

This is indeed one class I would not even consider skipping lol :P
I love the way it was written with your full force of imagination, keep writing, dude

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

Many thanks^^
Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

You're welcomezzz
Amazinggg....wonderfully written

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

Thanks very much^^
Wow. Is it okay that I almost feel the need to avert my eyes from the images in my mind? O_O;
It has a bit of a stream of consciousness feel there in the beginning. Like, despite the, er... physical attraction, the narrator is distracted by things in their surroundings.
I have to say... the last three lines seem almost platonic, as compared to the rest of the work. It gives it an interesting contrast of wild passion and sweet love. It portrays the human mind in a very realistic light, I think.
Despite the umm... sexual tension, it reads very well, and I really enjoyed it. :3 *claps* Well done, as usual.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

Haha no that's quite alright :P I was most likely going for some kind of parallel between romantic l.. read more
very interesting work!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

Many thanks :)
very nice and I liked how the underlined words brought up ads,very interactive. The last line is my fav.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

8 Years Ago

Haha I have nothing to do with the ads, I don't know where they came from :P Thank you though, I'm g.. read more

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558 Views
15 Reviews
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Added on September 18, 2012
Last Updated on September 18, 2012
Tags: slurp, quiver, shoulder, tongue, sweat, hum, hips, schoolboys, stomach, goosebumps, fiddleheads, education, syllable, lonely, melodic, angels

Author

kublakhan27
kublakhan27

Nova Scotia, Canada



About
My first book is out! Any comments that anyone may have to offer regarding my work would be deeply appreciated, as I'm yet to get a review. www.amazon.com/Waltz-Around-Swirls-Steven-Fortune/dp.. more..

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