you came back (who are you)

you came back (who are you)

A Poem by the nothing
"

you must read man in the mask and go away no come back to understand

"

I stand at the railing waiting for you

but you never came

can i blame you

after what Ihave done

you should never come back

I have never seen your face but...

it is has if I knew you sense I was born

as if you were my brother

"man in the mask" I call one last time preparing to jump

not jump not die but sleep and dream in a place

were there is no hate

every one knows oneanother

were ther is nothing like this

goodbye "MAN IN THE MAAAAAAASK"

I cry your name for the last time

for were i am going there is no goodbyes

as i fall towrds to comferting glow of the cars below

I fill something clasp my wrist

and pull me up,wraping me in it's warm embrace

"you came back man in the mask" I recite

© 2009 the nothing


Author's Note

the nothing
there is a spoiler in the text to the last ep

My Review

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Reviews

i like how you make kind of like pieces of the story/poem happening it goes really good together :)

Posted 14 Years Ago


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(:
Good, lots of grammatical errors, but good. Also, if she has jumped and three seconds later someone grabs her, don'tcha think she would already be halfway donw to the cars?

Eh, it's my logic. :]

Posted 14 Years Ago


Wow! great three poems. You might consider combining them (into one work but separated by, say, titles OR each poem could be a separate stanza). Ummm, is the narrator a girl? I'd...hope so. Otherwise I'd say this is a gay love story. And I hope I didn't just read a gay love story.
"after what Ihave done" after what I have done perhaps? A space would behoove you here.
"as i fall towrds to comferting glow of the cars below" the COMFORTING glow of the cars below? How is death (in this way) at all comforting? And towrds is towArds, comferting should be comfOrting.
'goodbye "MAN IN THE MAAAAAAASK" Maybe the goodbye should be in the quotations? And the quotations need to end in a period/exclamation mark/sentence ender thingy.
The "I recite" could be cut. It's not necessary.
Gj,
--Andrew


Posted 14 Years Ago


You have created a story line that is quite good. They could stand alone very easily, but together create substance. Well done. Phantom...........

Posted 14 Years Ago


Even as a stand-alone, the intentionally fragmented thought trains, the whirl of emotions and the racing of a mind from darkness and despair to hope and perhaps confusion, all combine to make this an enjoyable interlude. Hope to read more from you.
Thanks, also for reviewing one of my remaining works. In one fit of depression - and the realization that words, in the end, matter not - I removed all of the poems, stories and other work here from the last three years. Glad you found a remnant you liked!

Posted 14 Years Ago


i like this seires of poems! they rock keep writing!

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Thank God for the Man in the Mask! Thus you are still here with us! Peace Hades!
Greg

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on April 13, 2009
Last Updated on May 28, 2009

Author

the nothing
the nothing

in your house, can you see me



About
love is blind but death can see sucks for you more..

Writing
Leavin Leavin

A Poem by the nothing



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