Poor old Lambkin

Life can be s**t.

Poor old Lambkin built a ship

with cotton from a girlie's slip

and tar squeezed out of fairy tales

and telly screens and such;

a mainsail woven out of guff

from magazines and horoscopes

and ropes spun out of grandma’s hopes;

a mast of inward looking glass.

Out to the Sea of Love he sailed

and as at last he sunk the land

behind that slender frail stern,

the plan he’d planned got out of hand:

for not another sail he saw,

just creatures risen from the deep,

deformed, lopsided, overbearing,

scaly buggers (monstrous beaks).

Some enraged at lovers past

spat caustic bile upon the mast.

Others cowed by vicious exes

screamed down from their crucifixes.

Frigid monsters (icy breath)

huffed and puffed to speed his death

and randy ones with virus loins

rained warts the size of cannon balls.

Lambkin bravely fought the fight,

the sea got savage, day got night:

a crimson crash of menstrual blood

had caused the hold to fill and flood,

and when a blast of steroid cream

rented his vessel down the beam

he plunged into the murky still,

only thirty, (but quite ill.)

Reviews

[Chris Shaw]

Very creative lakinbob from :ammersmuth and well written. Poor old Lambkin eh.? Yep life can be s**t. Can take a turn for the worse when you think you've got it sorted. You have a wild imagination.

Chris

[Beccy]

How brilliantly imaginative this whole poem is. Love the lesson contained in your clever, clever lines.

'warts the size of cannon balls,' Yeuk!

Beccy.

[Neville]

You certainly caught this old fella off guard.... This was a real treat to stumble across this cold and windy nocte.... Top marks to ya and well deserved....

Neville

[Eilis]

A bit of a naive one, then. Poor fella. I suppose we are all prone to being sunk by our delusions. Eventually the world shows us the way, it can't be helped.

Sure is hell to become informed by all the wrong information and then find yourself, a Lambkin, face to face with the actuality.

This put me in mind of a twisted fairytale or nursery rhyme. Things don't always turn out peachy when we hit the high seas in search of, god knows what.

I liked your approach to this. A bit of light-hearted rhyming verse can sometimes temper the hardness of a life-lesson. Good stuff.