A Day to Remember

A day most go through

It had to come
The day I had dreaded for so long
I helped you pack your bag
You were leaving
My heart was bleeding

Trying to hide my tears
You looked so very beautiful standing there
There were tears in your eyes too
But you were being brave

How the years had flown by
It seemed like only yesterday
I first held you in my arms
Kissed you tenderly
Fell in love with you, I still am, always will be

Your fragrance enraptured me
Held me in your spell
You are divine

And now you are leaving me
Alone and desolate
Walking off into strange new worlds
To places you never dreamed
Making new friends

You looked back as you walked away
I saw the tears fall from your eyes
I hope you didn't see mine
It broke my heart to say goodbye




On this your very first day of school

Author's Note

Redone, hope you like it :O)

Reviews

[Drake Ryder]

Pretty good actually. I like it, but if I may bring up a few spelling mistakes that could be easily fixed, "defencless" should be spelled "defenceless." Also, though it's not exactly necessary, "tear drops" could be one word. There was a missing period in between "mine" and "but" on the third to last line, and perhaps a semicolon might belong in between "sight" and "held" on the fourth to last line.
Great poem though, I give it a 94%, and if not for the typos, I would give it 98%. I don't think it's 'poor' as you say in the author's note. Great work Linear.

[Sanjeeta Sharma Pokhar..]

I felt..It was me...I felt the same when I , for the first time , went to the world of kids and knowledge...I wanted my mom to be by my side ..when the gang of kids played prank on me...Linear..Your flow of words are uncommon...make us in to your
character of "You " in your poem..I loved..and liked...and felt..I should be blessed with some more poems of yours...
Looking to hear more,..
Sanjeeta :)

[An owl on the moon]

Here is that wondrous moment, the anticipation.. the fear.. You share this intimate glimpse with a delicate voice, beautifully sung..

[KATHY SUE SILLS]

This was beautiful! Never have had kids, but me and sis raised our neibors kids and we cried their first day of school, now their finishing school! Very well written.

[yelena]

A very touching poem..Thanks for sharing.

[LA Lorena]

This is great! It captures perfectly that moment when they start their journey away from home and parents and begin to make their way in the outside world. Very well done!

[xjust-for-me.x]

still beautiful

[Murtuza]

Really touching. I love it :)
Warmed up my heart

[Poe Redd]

Awwwwwww! That is so cute! I just love this one! It really is strong. Almost makes me want to cry, and the kid's going to school, haha. Beautifull write.

[sarah]

Such a strong and well written poem I am impressed wonderful work!

[Terra]

i love it!so tender and loving!!!i'll dread when that day comes!