Meeting the Ocean

Meeting the Ocean

A Poem by the in between
"

I wrote this when I was 10 at Camp Keep

"

The sun is north,

The water is west,

The air is east,

And the south is soil.

 

The beach is so cold

and very old.

It reminds me

of a sunny day

when I start to feel funny.

 

I get so dandy

when it is sandy.

I am going to miss

that big blue ocean

because it is so peacful.

© 2010 the in between


Author's Note

the in between
haha please don't be too hard on me

My Review

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Featured Review

I like the last stanza in this poem. I love the ocean and have only seen it once in my life time but it is quite amazing. This poem is detailed but for me it lacked a little sparkle. the flow is off the the description is quite amazing. I am sure if you take a look at it later on then you could add to it making it shine.

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

considering you wrote this when you were 10, this is amazing. a job well done.

but again, you lack that last point because there is no mention of boobies. (is there something wrong with me? lol!)

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

gorgeous imagery liz! I love this, it's beautiful. :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on August 6, 2010
Last Updated on August 9, 2010

Author

the in between
the in between

unknown, CA



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