A Stained Red Rose

I actually wanted to name this: Love a cautionary tale. But thought against it because it wasn't pessimistic enough.

A Stained Red Rose 

By

Carlos Lorenzo Estrada 

We are the echoes of our broken hearts.

Their accumulations lasting; before departs

This state of mind we learn to live from depths within

To find solace in the darkness of our frailed sin.

The pain that is dulled by a changing tide

Stripped of all our worthlessness and petty pride.

Gone is all the love that we could ever give.

Yet hope is what remains, in hearts that still forgive.  

And truth be told only love can replenish love.

For these matters of the heart are complications of

A soul that oft refuses to concede its vain belief 

And seeks the worst that love can give in false relief.

So we shall satiate the yearning in the drowning of our woe

Dance with nameless strangers who we'll never really know.

To just remind ourselves that we can truly feel again 

In an endless game of make believe that we pretend.

So be cautious of the thorned red rose given to your heart.

A precious gift, insidious, reflects of a love which will depart.

Author's Note

A rose by any other name.....enough with the bard already! I was trying to write happy stuff today. Like floating clouds, blue skies, bird singing, you know a typical lovely day. But nope my muse wasn't having it. She was laying on my sofa in shear silk scarves looking like Cate Blanchett with a very sensual English accent. I just couldn't ignore her. Makes me feel like I want to hand her a rose with extra thorns. But who am I kidding she looks like Cate Blanchett I tell you! What kind of idiot would give her a rose with thorns...are you crazy. Yes my dear I'm heading to the store now to get you a bottle of Champagne. (Who am I kidding I could only afford thunderbird) Anyway feel free to leave thoughts below.

Reviews

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Each and every stanza here is so, so wonderful and breathtaking. A wonderful reminder too and I can feel the emotion that was poured in and put into every word. 'We are the echoes of our broken hearts' this is the kind of work that'd be famous, on wall art, tattooed, even! This is wonderful, an anthem of all kinds for people who have been in the same or similar situations. If love isn't taken care of the right way, its thorns can quickly become far more prominent- and that's scary. But the message you put into this wraps up all that pain into here, into a beautiful piece. Thank you for sharing. (:

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you so much colacat for your words. I truly appreciate the comment on this work. It is a very somber piece and reveals the darker aspects of love. We can never know the true intentions of a person's heart we can only hope. And all we truly control is how we will love and give it. In some ways this poem takes me back to 81 and the TV series based on the Steinbeck novel East of Eden. In it the mother is incapable of loving her two sons and reads them with a cold indifference because that was all she had ever known of love in her life. It was truly heartbreaking and a sad parable that spoke of the darker aspects of love and the destruction it has wrought in its wake. This poem speaks to those similar ills. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me on this poem.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

It was my pleasure! Hearing other people's side, opinions, stories is always such a wonderful experience.

[JE Falcon]

You really nailed it with this poem, all the ups and downs touched upon, and viewed in the mind by the reader. As far as the Author's Notes, you should copy them and use them as a start to a story, if you haven't already done that. --- If there was anything I would suggest, it would to make the font a little larger so some of us old farts can see it easier. LOL --- Keep up the struggle.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you JE for sharing your thoughts on this poem. I so hear you on the font size. Without my reading glasses these old eyes always struggle when leaving comments on other writers work as well. I was a bit surprised by this poem because I didn't think it would resonate with anyone when I submitted it here and at another site. When it did I was actually shocked because it is a very pessimistic view of love in all honesty. Thank you again my friend for the kind words.

[NhanHoang]

you are amazing, i'm writing a poem about love because of you now, okkkkk time to write

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you for your kind words on this poem. I have to admit that I am very surprised by how many people are drawn or can relate to this particular poem. It's a very pessimistic and moody view of the darker side of love. I guess its theme resonates because it talks of heartbreak and its effects. Every time I read this poem it reminds me of my mom and how she basically stopped wanting to be a mother once she divorced my father. She chose a life of freedom over the responsibility of raising her kids. I had a difficult time accepting this because I was about 13 yrs old and needed to have a parent at that time to guide me through those difficult years. Love has consequences and I feel this sad poem kind of reflects that reality. Thank you for taking the time to read this poem and leave a kind comment about it. I truly appreciate it.

[NhanHoang]

woah ouch, my mom and dad divorced when I was like 7, she moved to the US and i was living with my grandparents for a year and a half and through all that drama of what my dad did to my mom, i still managed to enjoy life, did what i love, got in trouble haha ate lots of snack/junk food/streetfood, it was an amazing childhood, i know you're older but my message to you is, even if life's slapping you with nothing but concrete there's always a light, there's always gonna be a light, a different angle to view what you went through, opportunities, love, and blessings so yeah, just enjoy life and make memories, i almost got run over by a car last Wednesday lol and my skateboard almost got run over too lol, but i laughed it off, didn't sit down and started crying, just laughed it off saying i just made myself a new memory to add to my book haha, anyway, i hope you have a wonderful day.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you for the kind thoughts I truly appreciate it. I actually myself got hit by a school bus in my late 20s it pulled right in front of me as I slammed into its side. But on reflex I was able to maintain my balance turning the bicycle sideways and lifting the entire thing in the air causing my body to hit the bus and bounce away from it. I also laughed it off but it was probably from shock more than anything. I got so lucky. Sounds like we both may have somethings in common. Thank you so much for the kind words.

[NhanHoang]

lol that sounds fun and dangerous, well you just got yourself a really cool memory there, good for you, and Thank you for this poem, without it these comments wouldn't be here.

[Zoe Richardson]

This is so, so good. And so true! I find it is best to divorce yourself from emotion, and leave love to fools and lesser mortals.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

You truly have a writer's heart and way of thinking. To write we become voyeurs and outsiders to the world around us. We must become unbiased by what we see to better capture it in words. Or else it simply becomes commentary instead of story. Doing this requires us to step out of our moral comfort and proclivities. To refrain from being judgemental and interjecting our perspective into the content we write. I will be the first to admit I fail in this endeavor quite a bit. I'm fallible and only human which causes my perspective to bleed into much of my work unfortunately. Though this particular work less so. It was influenced and inspired by strong women in my life. And in a way an indictment toward us men to learn to love better. And not be the thorned red rose. Thank you for your true and inciteful thoughts. I truly appreciate it and value your words.

[Zoe Richardson]

I am only objective about what I read. What I write comes from the deepest parts of me.

[Coyote Poetry]

I loved your work today Carlos.
"So be cautious of the thorned red rose given to your heart.
A precious gift, insidious, reflects of a love which will depart."
I agree with the above lines. Beautiful, don't mean safe and kind. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry and your thoughts.
Coyote

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you CP and yes I totally agree with your thoughts. Love is such a beautiful virtue but it can also be an insidious vices as well. For bad love can change a heart forever. Thank you again.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome my friend.

[Carol Crismond]

Can anyone go through life without a broken heart or a rose with more thorns than the aroma of rose petals. Your poem is clear and actually is pessimistic. It rings of a person who has never overcome the stabbing reality of a love ending badly. Caution is the word that I see in between the lines. Perhaps you should be cautious of Cate Blanchett in shear silk scarves; watch out for the thorns. Enjoyed your poem. By the way no matter what age we are we have all had that experience we spend a lifetime trying to forget.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

So very true. We are the accumulations of these pained memories, as well as good ones, they shape our perspectives and beliefs, and also personalities. Some become ruinous in their behavior because their pessimistic view says nothing god comes from love. Then there are those eternal optimist who see love's better nature and reason to continue striving for its highest virtues. This was the pessimistic view represented in this poem which I seldom subscribe to depending on my mood of course. Most of the times I believe there is now better virtue to fight for then that of love because without it we will never reach our better humanity. And who would ever want to live in a world of endless hate? Not I. Thank you for your insightful thoughts on this work.

[Betty Hermelee]

What a perfect metaphor for love, the rose is a symbol of love, but the thorns can hurt, just like love can hurt. If one doesn’t nourish love and it goes both ways, then the thorn breaks one’s heart. It always should be a give and take situation. You put a lot of thought into this piece Carlos, and every word has a delicate meaning, a deep meaning, a painful meaning; but there is still a hint of hope here.
Excellent! My comments didn’t do justice to this masterpiece of yours Carlos.
Best, B

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you Betty for your kind thoughts on this poem. Most of my personal influences in my writing are women. I have always been surrounded by the strong voices of women in my life. They inspire with their strength and fortitude of heart. And none more so then my grandmother who raised me mostly during the important years of my life. She will always be my own personal hero. In any piece of work I write that has a hopeful comforting message pieces of her resides within that writing. I share to the readers her influence on my heart. Without her I would not have the strength and will to be strong, truthful, and uncompromising in my voice as a writer. And without her I would not be so compassionate and empathetic as a human being. She is the sole reason I write the way I do. Never leaving words unsaid. I write to always hold onto her memory. Thank you for your kind words I truly appreciate the time you have taken to express them. They mean a lot to me.

[Betty Hermelee]

Carlos you are a deep thinker and writer and I admire that trait, not everybody can express themselves as well as you. Bravo!

[Fran Marie]

smiling at your author's Cate Blanchette
and champagne all on in the same day
oh your imagination works overtime ..but
look at this lovely poem she inspired
There are the heart breakers and the heartbroken

C'est la vie I think I've live on both sides of
the heart..sometimes not even realizing it
you're such a talented writer..this piece
is so we'll expressed

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you Fran for such a kind comment on this piece. I know I have mentioned this in the past but it does deserve to be repeated. Many of my personal influences upon my writing journey have been women. So many have exhibited strength and grace in the most difficult moments of their lives. In some ways this piece speaks of that strength needed to survive devastating heartbreak. The kind based on deceit and lies, as well as disloyalty. Though it may have fractured aspects of their souls they continue to hold out hope on the ideas of love, though with a bit more caution and pessimism. Thank you so much for your comment and my muse Cate says hello.

[Fran Marie]

you re so vey welcome
props to cate also;

[jen]

Such food for thought Carlos!!! Such true words. I still dream of those who wounded my young heart so many years ago. Clay and Kent. Once from when I was 18 the other 19 and each I was so sure I could not live without. My dreams are always about re-discovering them in some way and of course I am 18 and 19 in my dreams. Those connections that a person makes when it is all so intense resonate because they are real and intense and the break is felt so deep because it never felt like it would happen. I think it's the me in those relationships I mourn because it was a person that I had no idea would not be found in that way again. Even like sweet Cate who is now older and a mom and playing a detective from Pennsylvania with a ponytail lol... it is a snapshot we want to revisit because it was so perfect and unexpected.... I can't add a but..... to make it all seem like it's ok and we can be the same because we can't. But it's nice to have it anyway :) and the dreams.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you Jenny for sharing your thoughts and memories this poem had conjured. I remember back in1978 being around 8 yrs old helping my grandmother in her garden. She grew poinsettias, tulips, roses, and quite a few other things. On this one particular time she had me helping her with the red rose bushes she had. She was trimming while I watered them and after a while asked to help her with the clippings. I reached down picking them up like they were just regular branches from a tree not realizing they had pretty nast thorns. Next thing I knew I was running around crying and screaming I was being bitten. My grandmother laughed and laughed seeing that. Eventually she calmed me down and slowly pulled the branches stuck to my little hands. A she was doing she was telling between broken English and mostly Spanish why roses are so beautiful but can hurt. Because they echo love. To bring them to their peak beauty you have to water and feed their soil well. Prim and prune the branches with care. Talk and sing to them to show affection and love . And after doing all those things they will be absolutely beautiful for you. But if you are not careful they will draw blood and take a piece of you with them. Love is the same. It takes nurturing and care to make it grow, along with trust. It grows to be beautiful by what you give in return. It takes a lot of your time. But if you are not cautious and careful it will bite you deep and leave a pain and scar that stays forever. I miss those days in that garden because I learned so much about how life is by simply tending to nature. Thank you again for your thoughts.

[SheIsMe]

Literally brought to tears...it's one of those days and this hit home so hard. You have an amazing talent.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you, Shel, you are too kind. I know this poem can be a bit somber, but my optimistic side believes not all love is like or ends like this work. It's difficult not to let a wrong kind of love change the heart. But given time and healing a new love will replace the pain. Much like the spring does to the winter. We grow to become stronger so when the next time comes the hurt is less. And from the lessons before we give as much love as we get. Thank you so much and you're a talented writer so please keep on sharing your art with the world.

[Lydia Shutter]

The heart might forgive, but the brain remembers. It is difficult to trust anyone after you feel the piercing of their thorns. The emotions in this poem are expressed so beautifully....from the heart. We do try to fool ourselves into believing next time will be different....perhaps that is a good thing. By the way, loved your description of the muse is shear silk scarves! Lydi**

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you Lydia for the kind words. Love is such a difficult subject to broach because just like art itself it is subjective to an individuals experience and beliefs. I feel most of us are drawn to it in writing because of its elusive ephemeral nature. It's the greater virtue that defines our humanity. Empathy could not exist without love. Yet there are so many ways to love, both good and bad. And both can at times have a destructive nature. Though the bad kind more so. I have known people whose personalities changed completely due to being wronged by love. It's so awful to see. This poem speaks to that in a cautionary way. At least that is what my muse tells me and who am I to argue. Women are always right when it comes to love. Thank you so much again for your thoughts on this poem.