The Fall

The Fall

A Poem by Carlos Lorenzo Estrada
"

See author's note on funny reason this poem came into existence. At least I think it's funny.

"
The Fall

By

Carlos Lorenzo Estrada 


The feeders of degradation wept
As the world they created slept

Pernicious mind and redolent thought
Malicious intent ripened violence is sought.

Sowers of a chasm in chaos unleashed 
Rhetorical hyperbolic words are released 

Into a world unwilling to change
Malevolence given as gift to attain 

So feed upon the remnants of insincerity 
Revel in this hatred with vile clarity 

The strings are all cut; we fall from our grace.
We're shadows of humanity torn from this place

An eye for an eye, an ear for an ear 
The ending is obviously fatally clear

When there's nothing left to hate what's left 
It is a question to ponder and never forget.

Lest we be noble through all this calamity 
What ashes will be left of our humanity 






 

© 2021 Carlos Lorenzo Estrada


Author's Note

Carlos Lorenzo Estrada
After over dosing on cheetos and mountain dew I recently had an out of body experience, or maybe just indigestion who knows. While in the Astral plane I ran into Shakespeare's younger step brother Buford Shakespeare. He told me the following, "Yo brah what up with all the hate over there? Why can't you'all git along? I'ma tell you the same thing I told Wilie." It was then Buford recited these words though truth be told I think he may have plagiarized most of it. I'm just saying, but I could be wrong. Anyway feel free to comment or leave kind colorful thoughts. I'm off for more cheetos.

My Review

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Featured Review

Sadly we live in violent and chaotic times. In fact nothing's changed much from the medieval brutality of the past. It's still alive and well today. Hard to believe, but you just have to switch on the news to see it. It isn't always far away either, there can be pockets virtually on your own doorstep. What happened to compassion? Maybe that word has been cancelled. All good wishes dear Carlos. Thank you for the eloquence in your words.

Chris

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

Thank you Chris for your thoughts I hope all is going well for you. I had been away for a couple of .. read more
Chris Shaw

2 Years Ago

I wondered why you hadn't been around. You were missed. Hope you are recovering well. Yes we have so.. read more



Reviews


The poem is titled "The Fall" which brings up thoughts of original sin and total depravity. If people are really depraved and inevitably inherit a vicious nature, there's no hope for improvement. One line reads "Into a world unwilling to change" which indicates change is difficult if not impossible. A later section reads "we fall from our grace" not "we fall from grace" which would be more biblical.


Posted 2 Years Ago


Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

Thank you for your comment on this poem. Your assessment is spot on in the defining qualities of the.. read more
An eye for an eye, an ear for an ear
The ending is obviously fatally clear

I really like this part, this world is so sad these days, Makes me think of staying inside more, but unfortuntaly I can not. well written

Posted 2 Years Ago


Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

thank you for your thoughts on this piece. It's a pretty crazy and angry world we live in right now... read more
no tell writer

2 Years Ago

I try my best to spread kindness, but sometimes I get weird looks from other's like "What is she doi.. read more
Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

I'm just a really old man but my advice to you would be just be you and don't let anyone try to chan.. read more
Who created this hate? Has it been around for centuries? Probably. This piece is an excellent comment on the hatred that is the essence of our society, especially at this moment. How can some people go on hating when there’s nothing left to hate? They fall from grace and burn into ashes. Why can’t we see some goodness in humans? It’s a sad state of affairs.
truly
B.

Posted 2 Years Ago


Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

I wholeheartedly agree with you, B. There should never be a choice between love and hate, for love s.. read more
Betty Hermelee

2 Years Ago

You’re very welcome dear Carlos😊
very cleverly done. despite being playful or playfully hatched, a deep, serious issue contained herein. where do things end and how the end or is an end imminent? is a world unwilling to change doomed? it is interesting that recently there has been talk of taking serious steps and forcing us to alter our behaviors that are detrimental to the planet. like the old adage, "pride cometh before the fall" as evidenced by adam and eve. good read that billy would appreciate especially munching on cheetos and washing them down with some dew ... :)

Posted 2 Years Ago


Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

Thank you Pete for your thoughts on this work. I'm a believer of the adage "If you stand for nothing.. read more
Written a manner Shakespeare would smile about :) I would say portals are not bad a thing to explore whether on cheetos or not lol The saddening state of this realm has turned cold and riddled with a lack of empathy, would that everyone could awake to that one thought and the rest may fall into place, ah - the title of this piece echoed in my mind :) A poignant statement Carlos, one that is important to articulate in such times...

Posted 2 Years Ago


Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

Thank you kindly Ruth for your thoughts on this poem. I am in total agreement with them. It is unfor.. read more
Sadly we live in violent and chaotic times. In fact nothing's changed much from the medieval brutality of the past. It's still alive and well today. Hard to believe, but you just have to switch on the news to see it. It isn't always far away either, there can be pockets virtually on your own doorstep. What happened to compassion? Maybe that word has been cancelled. All good wishes dear Carlos. Thank you for the eloquence in your words.

Chris

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

Thank you Chris for your thoughts I hope all is going well for you. I had been away for a couple of .. read more
Chris Shaw

2 Years Ago

I wondered why you hadn't been around. You were missed. Hope you are recovering well. Yes we have so.. read more
Old Burford has a point. If all they can do is rant and rave, then what does that show about them and their lives, other than they are filled with hate so much it has to pour out of them and infect others, and mountain dew ain't gonna help with calm reflective happy thoughts, is it? It's like anxiety in a can (or bottle)
You should have looked out for John lennon on your plane. He has a way of calming anyone off a ledge 😊
And we could do with more John Lennons and less of the Trumpist angry men who only ever show that for all they have, their contents are not so fresh.
But we'll done for staying so lucid whilst having the resting heartbeat of a marathon runner in a hurry 😊

Posted 2 Years Ago


Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

Ah one of the great poets Mr Lennon. I deeply share his hope and "imagine" a better humanity for us .. read more
I must've been clicking on your mostly "soft" poems since I started to get to know your poetry, so finding this powerful statement is a nice change! The harshness that passes as social discourse is one reason I live alone in the wilderness (((HUGS)))

PS . . . your cheetos confessions are pretty funny, too!

Posted 2 Years Ago


Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

Being born into the 60s despite its turmoil inspired hope in us as a society. What is maddening is h.. read more
Wow, Carlos! Haunting and so tragically accurate during this time of chaos and hate in our world. Your writing is phenomenal, your words harsh, but true. Wonderful, sad piece of art!

Posted 2 Years Ago


Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

Thank you Jennifer for your kind thoughts on this piece. This was a very bleak write in all honesty... read more
Why won't the world change? Why won't people change? Why won't I change? It is my view that we only learn through suffering. The harder the ego-shell, the more force it will take to break through it. So, it seems we're in for a rough ride.

Will Shakespeare didn't have a younger step brother named Buford. I think you OD-ed on sugar. But, as we know facts are not the same as truth, so your message is still valid. :)

Posted 2 Years Ago


Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

2 Years Ago

Thank you Laz for your thoughts on this work. I am in total agreement with you. We truly are in for .. read more

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Added on August 24, 2021
Last Updated on August 24, 2021
Tags: satire humor horror anger

Author

Carlos Lorenzo Estrada
Carlos Lorenzo Estrada

salinas , CA



About
If I can say something worth saying that makes just one person think about others...I'll try. The greatest storyteller was my grandmother. I miss her stories. Also, I would like to add to please pay.. more..

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