What If I Don't Want To

What If I Don't Want To

A Poem by Margie (Macy) F
"

What is your answer?

"
What if I don't want to go
What if I don't want to stay
What if all I wanted
disappeared today?

I hadn't taken chances
I hadn't been brave
What would I have missed
If I were to die today?

So many options
of things to do and see
yet,I struggle 
to find one right for me.

Freedom is bondage
for the OCD
Too much uncontrolled 
to be able to be free.

Some say --
control is the king
others say --
enlightenment is key

So much noise
shouting what to do
people like me
need quiet to get through.

So Sir, 
answer my question
what am I to do
... 

if I don't want to go
but I don't want to stay
and everything I wanted
disappeared today?

© 2019 Margie (Macy) F


Author's Note

Margie (Macy) F
What is your answer to this question? Please comment below. Thank you.

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Featured Review

I dont have ocd (apart from my kitchen cupboards, albums, books, dvd's and my I.T. Crowd shrine in my bedroom, my toothpaste tube and checking mu feet every ten steps when im out, to make sure im wearing matching shoes....But I don't wanna either.
Okay, my argument was going to hold more sway, right up until realising I do have it (i also count my steps and freak out if I have an odd number of weetabix left)
But I can see similar in myself. If I need to go out, I tend to do it at silly o'clock when there is less people around. I reckon im just too clumsy to be around people that much. I would ideally like to avoid me too, but seems im stuck with me.
Holy s**t! I do have ocd....Thank the made up beardy guy in the clouds that no shrinks will read this and send a team with wraparound coats to take me to a nice, bouncy room. Phew.
My advice is, screw the perspective. If we can't change it, at least we can laugh about it.
Now you must excuse me, I need to count my weetabix :)

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Margie (Macy) F

2 Years Ago

Lorry, I like you. You have SUCH a way of communicating that is fun. I'm not OCD, but sometimes I fe.. read more
Lorry

2 Years Ago

Thanl you. Though I must warn uou, that judging by popular opinion, it gets old, real quick. Just co.. read more



Reviews

My answer IS "The Master's miss..."

Posted 10 Months Ago


Well for starters you could make sure everything in the Kitchen is pointing in the right direction, and that alone will take care of today :)
A good poem asking us to consider then offer a simple truth to those they love,
And
Then check to see if all the edges of the bed are the same.


Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

My OCD is now mostly passing urges. I used to touch three things in a row (usually something like wall panels in an office,) count ceiling tiles (I usually cheated and multiplied,) and many of the things Lorry documented in her review. I suppose my remaining problem is still with others. I still want to scream 'do it right' to people who obviously don't understand that I am the one who knows how things should be. I'm nice to others, but most of the time I just want to be a hermit.
This was a nice read, especially the point about so much noise.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Margie (Macy) F

1 Year Ago

Iain, you made me laugh on the 'I usually cheated and multiplied' part. Thank you for your reply. I .. read more
Sometimes it feels like my life is standing still. These are the moments where I doubt my abilities and my purpose in this world. I ask myself a question of whether or not my life has meaning in some way and I have now come to realize that that might be a dangerous question to ask.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Margie (Macy) F

1 Year Ago

It is only dangerous if you follow the wrong answer. Always, always look to the positive no matter h.. read more
I liked the dance of the words. Should I stay or should I go. Old song verse. I disappeared twice in my life. Even volunteer for war to escape boring life. Can be done but. Old wise country saying. Can't return from where you left. When I came back, one grandparent gone and father also. A interesting poem. Asked a important question dear Margie.
Coyote

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Margie (Macy) F

1 Year Ago

I hope it does prompt thought. At 46 years old, I am STILL trying to find my way. Many thanks Coyote.. read more
Coyote Poetry

1 Year Ago

I don't believe I found my way yet. We keep going forward. Maybe save one life? You are welcome Marg.. read more
There are too many things to ponder here, for me to answer it all in a review. For starters, I've always been a person who cannot stand half-hearted friends around me. If you can't be all-in, then go away -- (to address your first stanza, so well expressed). A little further on, to address the OCD issue . . . in my younger days I was a control freak, very tough to be . . . glad for old age & brain injury that slowed down my thinking, so now I can finally relax & NOT think sometimes! *smile* All in all, you bring up many excellent ideas for pondering & you express everything creatively! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Margie (Macy) F

2 Years Ago

Margie, I always feel like I am talking to myself when I respond to you. ;) I'm sure you noticed we .. read more
barleygirl

2 Years Ago

I first clicked on you becuz of our shared name! There hasn't been any disappointment!
Margie (Macy) F

2 Years Ago

Thank you so much!!
Just be here now in the present moment- its all we have, clever poem🌹

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Margie (Macy) F

2 Years Ago

Thank you so much for your response. It is a lot easier to live in the moment. Sometimes, looking fo.. read more
I dont have ocd (apart from my kitchen cupboards, albums, books, dvd's and my I.T. Crowd shrine in my bedroom, my toothpaste tube and checking mu feet every ten steps when im out, to make sure im wearing matching shoes....But I don't wanna either.
Okay, my argument was going to hold more sway, right up until realising I do have it (i also count my steps and freak out if I have an odd number of weetabix left)
But I can see similar in myself. If I need to go out, I tend to do it at silly o'clock when there is less people around. I reckon im just too clumsy to be around people that much. I would ideally like to avoid me too, but seems im stuck with me.
Holy s**t! I do have ocd....Thank the made up beardy guy in the clouds that no shrinks will read this and send a team with wraparound coats to take me to a nice, bouncy room. Phew.
My advice is, screw the perspective. If we can't change it, at least we can laugh about it.
Now you must excuse me, I need to count my weetabix :)

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Margie (Macy) F

2 Years Ago

Lorry, I like you. You have SUCH a way of communicating that is fun. I'm not OCD, but sometimes I fe.. read more
Lorry

2 Years Ago

Thanl you. Though I must warn uou, that judging by popular opinion, it gets old, real quick. Just co.. read more

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307 Views
8 Reviews
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Added on January 8, 2019
Last Updated on March 15, 2019
Tags: life, dreams, future, plans

Author

Margie (Macy) F
Margie (Macy) F

GA



About
Artist, writer, and anything I want to be. (aka Margie F) My writing is original, and I DO NOT give consent for it to be copied, distributed or used in any way. more..

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