Separate Ways

Separate Ways

A Poem by marty360
"

Just a quick piece I knocked up on the thought of something.

"
The day will come where I will be gone,
And I can't give you all you deserve,
But know that I will be there,
Waiting in the life after next.

We've spent some great years,
Together, even when we're apart,
But we found a way,
For our hearts to never be apart.

Even though I am gone,
My heart still belongs to you,
Because you made me, me,
And gave my heart to you.

My love will be forever,
Even though my form may be not,
I'll still be with you everyday,
On the shelf in the pot.

© 2013 marty360


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

Wow, I feel like the last line just slapped me in the face. This is really good. I like that your poems aren't very long and this one is probably my favorite. :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


marty360

7 Years Ago

Thank you for your comments :-)
I don't like to write too many long pieces as I find meaning c.. read more
What a sweetly romantic poem said in simple little lines.Great write:)

Posted 7 Years Ago


marty360

7 Years Ago

Thank you :)
What a sweet poem. It makes me think of elderly couples, one passing on before the other... I've always wondered how they survive that, how strong they are to lose the person they've been with for the majority of their lives often times, to suddenly be so alone.

I enjoyed the ending, it's not where I was expecting it to go. You have a very straight forward voice and the simplicity is elegant. Very nice write, thank you for sharing.

Posted 7 Years Ago


marty360

7 Years Ago

Yes, that is something that is unknown until you are feeling it.
Thank you :-)
A very nice and sweet poem. I like the ending the most...Bravo

Posted 7 Years Ago


marty360

7 Years Ago

Thank you very much :-)
Sami Khalil

7 Years Ago

You are welcome...:)
Damn! the ending of this piece just hit me on the head.. great way of using your talent! haha
All the emotions that bottled up and exploded with great simplicity yet an awesome write
Keep writing :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


marty360

7 Years Ago

Thank you, Annie :-). Really appreciate your comments :-)
Annie S

7 Years Ago

You're welcome :)
very nice...
meaning is coming up easily, feeling it,
your words works,

simplicity is shiney.



Posted 7 Years Ago


marty360

7 Years Ago

Thank you for your comments :-)
A good piece with some raw emotions in there, I enjoyed reading it. The phrasing is a little difficult in places to understand, especially in the second and third verse. A good idea overall :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


nice poem, the last line made me think... on the shelf in the pot... by that you mean in the ashes right.
but yes its an interesting peice of poetry that deals with death.

Posted 8 Years Ago


marty360

8 Years Ago

Yes I was on about the ashes in the urn. Thank you for your review, Marion. I appreciate it :).

Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

275 Views
8 Reviews
Rating
Added on July 27, 2013
Last Updated on July 27, 2013
Tags: Death, gone, apart, together, forever, urn

Author

marty360
marty360

Bradford/Huddersfield, West Yorkshire, United Kingdom



About
21 years of age. Studying Global Business Management at university and I am in my final year of study. Plan on moving to America after my degree so you may see a lot of American themed pieces or pie.. more..

Writing
Change Change

A Poem by marty360



Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


The Cleanman The Cleanman

A Poem by Avinash