Come on, my friend, embrace life's pain, the heartbreaks, and your death to come. Don't drench yourself in worry's rain and drag through soggy days, so glum. Go slam your dreams upon that drum that rages in your chest so sure as breaths you seize approach their sum and fearless thoughts are all that's pure.
There's comfort in the wallowing and moaning when life's oh so tough, but poison's all you're swallowing and tainted confidences bluff. Don't fantasize that hope's enough. Break free. The action is the cure. Be willful and grind smooth those rough and fearful thoughts. And, bleed them pure.
The world's a blaze and you a spark, a flame, soon smoke and blown out ash; so burn on 'til your skies are dark and strangle time 'til moments flash. And, on that final breeze, you thrash, through whipping winds you won't endure, let all the gods proclaim you brash and fearless and a life so pure.
This is a wonderfully powerful read, and again, it seems that "you saved the best for last". --- "And, on that final breeze, you thrash,
through whipping winds you won't endure,
let all the gods proclaim you brash
and fearless and a life so pure." --- Well done.
This is a wonderfully powerful read, and again, it seems that "you saved the best for last". --- "And, on that final breeze, you thrash,
through whipping winds you won't endure,
let all the gods proclaim you brash
and fearless and a life so pure." --- Well done.
dearest Mattavelli… amazing poetry.
At 81 years, I have just begun to be a
Drummer with hummingbirds… so busy sipping Nectar and dancing with the flowers.
tenderly, Pat
Posted 11 Months Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Months Ago
Thanks for reading, Patricia! :)
Last week I watched a documentary about hummingbirds on PBS... read moreThanks for reading, Patricia! :)
Last week I watched a documentary about hummingbirds on PBS. They are amazing creatures.
Very moving poem, Matt. The last line especially really spoke to me. Very relatable now that I'm up there in years. You have a very strong writing style that elicits emotion from your readers. I always find that quality of writing important. It demands of the reader and challenges them. Wonderful work my friend.
First of all I love the structure of this poem, the strong and soft word you choose to express your theme; Everyone suffers with sorts of pain at one time or another; I think what you're saying, work through this pain with action, what ever that may be; don't think that hope alone will solve your problems; you must go through hell and high water to cleanse and purify oneself. Don't ever give up. I thin the poem is extraordinary and upbeat. ..and I love your photo; are you talking to him?
Best, B.
Posted 1 Year Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
1 Year Ago
Thanks for reading, Betty! :)
Yes, the photo is my son. He's all I care about. Haha
One day, he'll pick up your book (dedicated to him, of course) and read this, marveling at his dad's poetical skill and keen wisdom.
With your hallmark rhythmic flow and spot-on rhymes, the a-b-a-b-b-c-b-cR scheme with the "pure" refrain (sans an envoi) is might-near a Ballade, and with a smidgeon of effort could easily be.
Still, one would be hard pressed to find issues to be critical of in this excellently rendered piece from your own heart and life's experiences to your beautiful son (love his handsome pic). 😊
Your writing's always a nice pleasure to enjoy … thank you sincerely for sharing! ⁓ Richard 🍃
Posted 1 Year Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
1 Year Ago
Thanks for reading and the compliments, Richard! :)
This one has a lot more rhyming sounds th.. read moreThanks for reading and the compliments, Richard! :)
This one has a lot more rhyming sounds than a ballade, so a smidgeon of effort would be a rewrite. Haha
1 Year Ago
Yeah,
You're right … now, that I look closer, V2 and 3 have a different rhyme scheme that V.. read moreYeah,
You're right … now, that I look closer, V2 and 3 have a different rhyme scheme that V1.
WHAT A WONDERFUL, UPBEAT AND POSITIVE MESSAGE IN THIS WELL WRITTEN GEM! IT'S JUST WHAT WE ALL NEED IN THIS TIME OF COVID AND OTHER PROBLEMS. THANKS FOR WRITING THIS! ~Sharon
nice rhythm & rhyme.
me being a positive person, i particularly like the 2nd stanza to stop wallowing & get on with it.
i believe life needs to be balanced to appreciate all the wonderful things, & how would you know they were wonderful ? 'cos every now & then less cheerful things happen to compare them with.
cheerio carola
Posted 1 Year Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
1 Year Ago
Thanks for reading Carola! :)
I wanted this to be inspiring. My feeling is that people should.. read moreThanks for reading Carola! :)
I wanted this to be inspiring. My feeling is that people should embrace their lives, not live in denial of the hardships and pain. We need contrast, yes.
LIFE IS A PARTY. DON'T BE A PINATA.
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Hello,
Thanks for visiting my page. I'm Matt. I enjoy reading and writing poetry. If you have a poem that you'd like me to read, please let.. more..