Kill the Clocks

Kill the Clocks

A Poem by mattavelli
"

.!.

"

Wake me up when the clocks are dead
and heartbeats hold the scale of time,
when old man envy's found his bed
and dreams that soothe frustration's crime;
when all the teachers' lessons rhyme
as children dance t'ward parenthood;
when infant wants are screams sublime
and all the thoughts of man are good.

Take me back where the words were said,
that caused the silver bells to ring;
where all our beastly ways were shed,
and mingled voices learned to sing;
where selfish winter met the spring
of our rebirth in brotherhood;
where hope's old dove first raised a wing
and all the thoughts of man were good.

Lead me now, down the path ahead,
and share the humming of your mind.
Let all your dreams and feelings spread
to every open ear they find,
and watch your passions be combined,
with those of every man who's stood,
to shape a world that will remind
us all of what we should and could.

© 2019 mattavelli


Author's Note

mattavelli
Please let me know what you think.

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Reviews

"Wake me up when the clocks are dead … " These words hook you from the very beginning. The rest of the poem uncurls its petals like a lotus blossom in the sun. This really is very, very good.

Posted 1 Month Ago


I sense a bit of Wordsworth in this. I mean a major Wordsworth vibe is flowing through this, especially in the last stanza. There's a transition oddity in Stanza 1 Line 4 (that line seems like it's supposed to be connected to the previous three, but there's no clear connection). Also, the commas in the second part of Stanza 3 are not needed, given that whole thought it one continuous progression. But everything else is astoundingly beautiful and powerful! Well freaking done!

Posted 1 Month Ago


This is a touching and wonderful poem, from beginning, middle and finale. It speaks volumes about beautiful, fragile and wondrous human existence.
The rhyme scheme is natural with a smooth flow and rhythm. I like the effective way refrain is used.

The way it is structured, is this a known poetic form?

Posted 3 Months Ago


mattavelli

2 Months Ago

Hey, BlackPrince, thanks for reading. Its not a known form, but a patterned rhyme that I like. ABABB.. read more
I agree that there is a strong message here. Also, I like the way the poem was worded. "share the humming of your mind." I have always liked this way of writing.

Posted 3 Months Ago


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This is the ultimate goal. A better world. It starts with each person doing their part. Leading by example.
I hope I leave my children with all that I've learned and ingrained in them a strong code of ethics.

Posted 6 Months Ago


Strong message here, beautiful poetry. Lovely flow and cadence. An excellent read. Well done mattavelli.

Chris

Posted 7 Months Ago


mattavelli

7 Months Ago

Thank you, Chris! :)
the message here is powerful.
If only we all could come together with all of man's thoughts being good.
I wonder at what time that might happen?
Where in the H is my clock?

Posted 7 Months Ago


mattavelli

7 Months Ago

Hi, Dave, thanks for reading! :)
I figure humanity will either learn to play nice or suicide... read more
Love the lilting meter you encase this in mattavelli. It sounds a sombre tale of reflection and fear that ends upon a more uplifting note. As others said those clocks! But clocks are mere messengers.

Posted 7 Months Ago


mattavelli

7 Months Ago

Thanks for reading, John! :)
I'd like to see all of humanity's tribes collapse into open hone.. read more
to me... this is best read aloud
third line second stanza might want to lose the... the? or add 5 more up to you
Your message(s) is ones of which i share very much, as well as the concept of crushing, killing and collapsing those damn clocks! the lines in between your rhythms flow are very clever with double meanings I do enjoy that style of write! down with the clocks!


Posted 7 Months Ago


mattavelli

7 Months Ago

Hey, Bad bunny, thanks for reading!
Aye, that THE needs to walk a plank. Thanks. :)
You have composed a wonderful 8 syllable meter her and the rhyming scheme is not forced at all.

On top of that the message is beautiful and yes ... let there be peace and joy the world over instead of choas... :)


Posted 7 Months Ago


mattavelli

7 Months Ago

Thank you for reading, Stella. :)

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Added on March 19, 2019
Last Updated on April 1, 2019

Author

mattavelli
mattavelli

FL



About
LIFE IS A PARTY. DON'T BE A PINATA. ------------------- Hello, Welcome to My page. I'm Matt. I enjoy reading and writing poetry. If you have a poem that you'd like me to read, please let me know .. more..

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A Poem by mattavelli



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