A cure for Gay

A cure for Gay

A Poem by Maya Storm
"

We have found a cure for same sex love! This is just for a laugh, don't get offended.

"

Introducing ‘Shake you straight’ from the makers of the ‘Christian slap’ and 'Muslim bomb Protection'

We have created a cure for gays, lesbians, bisexuals and Transgender all in a pink can.

 

We have found a cure for same sex love! Don’t get trapped with programs like:

 

Pray away the gay “homosexuality is not only wrong, but curable; rely on the power of prayer to make a miracle happen.”

 

Hug the gay away: Bring back the ‘distant same sex parent’ and have them hug you for 3 days straight.

 

Make friends with straight people, they will help you bend your curve.

 

Loss your same sex attraction by joining the ‘don’t ask don’t tell’ program, because denial is the perfect solution for something that is apart of your everyday life.

 

Other known unsuccessful programs include the following:

 

        • Exorcism of the gay demon
        • Shock therapy 
        • Hypnosis
        • 'Overdosing' On Homosexuality
        • Cold Showers 
        • Transplants
        • Cocaine, Strychnine and Genital Mutilation
        • And bicycling

 

Shake you straight encourages tolerance it seems to have worked for racism, sexism, classism and many more.

© 2012 Maya Storm


Author's Note

Maya Storm
Please please don't take this too seriously!

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Reviews

I appreciate this bit a whole lot, as I am bisexual, and I know all too well how people here in Kentucky tend to feel! I love my home-state, don't get me wrong, but this piece is completely brilliant! Thank you for sharing this, it was a hilarious read. :)

P.S., The key to a successful piece of satire is to lead the reader on without a disclaimer. They will know it's just a joke, half the time. ;)

Posted 10 Years Ago


Maya Storm

10 Years Ago

Joseph I had to put a disclaimer. In fact I put it up long after I posted this piece. Some ppl withi.. read more
"Pray away the gay " very funny =)

Posted 10 Years Ago


So damn funny! Ugh and to think, there are some people out there who actually believe there is a cure for homosexuality.
Thank you for mocking them so very well.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is brilliant. Completely hilarious.

Posted 11 Years Ago


This is hilariously fantastic. I love the advertisement spin!

Posted 11 Years Ago


This is a funny one!

Posted 11 Years Ago


OMGOMGOMGOMG

so good so unique cracks me up

Posted 11 Years Ago


Hahaha! oh well..

Posted 11 Years Ago


How bout a cure for stupidity? Too funny:)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Maya Storm

11 Years Ago

My next poem should be that... It would take me sometime to find possible cures...but you just spark.. read more
I live in SF...need I say anything more?
Very funny, Maya. Many times I had heard things like this growing up in Indiana.

"Maya" is also one of my favorite songs by "the Church"
:-)

Posted 11 Years Ago



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1447 Views
26 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on July 30, 2012
Last Updated on July 30, 2012
Tags: gay, lesbian, trans-sexual, trans gender, same sex, tolerance, love

Author

Maya Storm
Maya Storm

Montreal , Quebec, Canada



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***[ I was away for a while and my 'read requests' are now in the 1000 range, I did not think it possible. I have turned it off for the moment, so if there is something that you need for me to read, .. more..

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