Deep Exhales From an Inner Organ

Deep Exhales From an Inner Organ

A Story by THE [ME]GEAN

            “No, really- Please don’t- I-” It all seemed to happen in one swift clean motion. A push, a graceful fall into the brick wall behind the school, and a deep exhale of air.

            “Don’t what?!” He looked down at the crumpled mess. A girl known to everyone to be so strong and talented, so not- what she really was to him, which was weak and prudent. “What the f**k should I not do-?! You tell me M-!”

            She looked up, the vision of a broken angry little boy before her blurred and dark. He was like a dark cloud looming over her. He followed her every step. He mimicked her every move. And cut her off at every turn. Every time she tried to speak he would cut her off with a swift blow to any part of her body he could reach, and he could always reach her. That was what was really scary. Not the fact that when she was around him it felt like she was on drugs, like she was weak, dizzy, and there, vulnerable. It wasn’t the fact that every time he exposed a bit of himself to her she felt all the more sorry for him and thus became closer. It wasn’t the fact that she had covered up and lost so much for him. It was the fact she was reachable and in love. If he wanted to do anything to her he could. He knew this, and he managed to work it to his advantage, just like a man would.

            “I loved you!” He grabbed her by the warm, making her wince in pain from a previous bruise left. “And now you’re breaking up with me?!”

            “My mom says she’ll call the cops.” She looked away from him, tears streaming down. “She says you’re too old.”

            “And you’re so protected. Poor little M-” He threw her against the wall again, this time so hard she couldn’t catch herself and she hit her head. It felt like a thousand needles going through her skull and the blur continued. All she could see now was the dark washed out purple clouds over head, and the bright red in the eyes of her attacker- her lover. “Such a f*****g princess!! Everyone loves M-, everyone thinks she’s so capable.” He mocked her own words. “Everyone but her father. Everyone but herself. Isn’t that right, M-?”

            “Don’t-!” She made a motion toward him.

He took it as a threat and kicked her back. The wound was much deeper this time. It was like she could actually feel her internal organs begin to bleed. She hit the ground so hard dust flew into her eyes and blinded her even more. They played little games on her tears and her cheeks, jumping and sticking to every wet surface.

“Don’t what?”

The crazed look she had seen so many times shot in his eyes once more, but this time she couldn’t see it. She didn’t see the punches being thrown anymore or even hear what he was saying. It all flew into a blur of taunts and fabrications that he chose to scare her with. He played off every fear and insecurity she could have possibly ever had and when she was too weak to stand or speak he looked down at the mess without pity. He began to cry.

“I loved you, M-” He looked down at his torn fists and scraped knees. “How could you do this?”

She looked up and tried to see. There shot the vision of a man that would never recover. It was not from anything she had done, though. It was something that happened way before her and she could never fix it. Even though the truth presented itself in sticks and stones she blamed herself. For why would he beat her if she wasn’t bad in some way? Why would he even raise a hand?

“I loved you too.” She buried her face in her hands, eyes stinging, palms bleeding, wrists nearly broken. She had never felt weaker in her life. That was when he grabbed her once more and pulled her too him.




© 2008 THE [ME]GEAN

Author's Note

Constructive critisizm if you will. Its a rough and needs lots of work.

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awesome work. I really didn't notice any where it needs work.

Posted 14 Years Ago

It doesn't need work. It's perfect the way it is. I've read this before (on your blog), and I still find it absolutely unbearable to get through. I love you. I love you more than anything.

Posted 14 Years Ago

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2 Reviews
Added on February 23, 2008



Fairview, OR

Hello, I�m Megean McBride. I�m a neo eccentric non-conformed semi-religious flapper with a slash of funkified backstage Betty punk who refuses to be labeled, set in stone, or.. more..