Cone of Shame

Cone of Shame

A Poem by Michael Stevens
"

More trouble for Fang!

"
                                                            
                                     Hi, Fang the Dog here again,

I know, I do more bitching than Rin-Tin-Tin,

But I'm pissed, let there be no doubt,

I'm perplexed, and I've just got to let it out!

 

 When I start thinking my master

is a walking harbinger of disaster,

that he couldn't possibly make

a bigger, stupider mistake,

'nnnk, wrong, thanks for playing!'

I was wrong is all I'm saying.

I mean, code-red embarrassment!

he's an idiot, a total incompetent!

 

From this, I'm supposed to learn, well,

not to crap on the carpet, or the floor, hell,

I did it to make a point,

you act like a dick, I'll anoint

everywhere with feces,

anywhere I damn well please!

The other dogs see this cone s**t,

and just howl with laughter, then after a bit,

start in ragging on me,

the anger and the shame I feel is something to see!

 

You'd have to go far out of your way

For my slope-headed master to play

the game, "The Even Stupider Stupidest Man Alive!",

but he does, and doesn't even have to try!

 

 

 

 

 

 

© 2015 Michael Stevens


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Reviews

I sympathize with Fang. My cat had to wear a cone when she had surgery, and it was a miserable few days before she finally worked it off. I didn't have the heart to put it on her again.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Michael Stevens

8 Years Ago

Yeah, our cat years ago had to where one so he wouldn't chew his stitches out, so what did he do? He.. read more

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86 Views
1 Review
Added on June 1, 2015
Last Updated on June 1, 2015
Tags: Dog, trouble

Author

Michael Stevens
Michael Stevens

About
I write for fun; I write comedy pieces and some dramatic stuff. I have no formal writing education, and I have a fear of being told I suck, and maybe I should give up on writing, and get a job makin.. more..

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