Life

Life

A Poem by K.Ace.James

Life is a push

Life is a shove

Life isn't anything without love.

A push to go on.

A shove from a friend.

The strength to get up and try again.

A kiss from your mother.

A hug from your dad.

Someone to lean on when you are down, and sad.

Love in your heart

No pain on your mind.

Never hold a grudge because the past, is behind.

Give me your deepest of trust and i'll give you mine.

Be a good person dont stab people in the back.

Because the pain hurts as if it were a real knife.

Just remember to love and just live your life ♥

© 2010 K.Ace.James


My Review

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Reviews

This was a delightful piece to read. However, you may want to take a look at the last few lines. While they work, they seem a trifle forced. Other than that, you could tighten it up with a bit of punctuation. Overall, I say well done!!!

Posted 13 Years Ago


Bravo. Fun to read.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Nice poem. Cute. decent flow until the last three lines.

Posted 14 Years Ago


I love the rhyming in the poem, it adds more meaning. Every word of it is true, and easily understandable. A very nice write.

Posted 14 Years Ago


hm... not an intense write. it felt very tum ti tum ti tum.. sorry! the message was nice.. but you could have written it stronger.

Posted 14 Years Ago


Dear Writer,

It's a pleasure to meet you and it's nice of Shannon (the girl below my review) for pointing you out to me. You bring a very nice message out - best summed in the last line of your review "remember to love and just live your life." Though I've never been a good write for love poems (though this isn't about love really, it's more about an appreciation of life through the magnifying glass of love).

First of all, I appreciate your good grammatical punctuation and sorts. But I think you laid this poem out a little too weird. A stanza doesn't have to be four lines, it can be just three. Experimentation is what makes poetry more enjoyable. Experimentation, practice, time, patience... these are all things that help every writer (no matter how long they've been writing) to grow. From a quick skim of your other writings, I sense an extraordinary source of potential skimming off your silhouette. (Not to be gay or anything, lol). You seem to have a great deal of potential.

There is a few places where you have a few grammatical errors like in line 13 where the "i'll" needs to have the i capitalized. Good flow and depth. Noticed the clever rhyming sequence. It's a really good piece of poetry. You should really try to incorporate stanzas into your poem (not that they are needed or anything to make it better). But yeah!

A few words of advice: 1) Never let yourself, as a writer or artist, become so deluded with arrogance that you can't stand criticism. Sometimes it's better to just say thanks and move on then to criticize someone for a lack of appreciation for art. 2) Never believe that you can't do better. People often enjoy the ability to depress people or put them down so that they can't excel. 3) Always be open-hearted, balancing what is that is just and honorable, to help build a foundation for you and all those interconnected to you.

Good job, bud! 9.8/10.

S. W. Scaggs

Posted 14 Years Ago


This was beautiful, the imagery and flow was amazing. ^_^

Posted 14 Years Ago



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Added on April 7, 2010
Last Updated on April 7, 2010

Author

K.Ace.James
K.Ace.James

wilmington, DE



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A Poem by K.Ace.James


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A Poem by K.Ace.James



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