Miserere Mei, Magister

A stressful winter day.

I walk home through the first snow of Canadian winter
Which usually causes me to beam with joy,
But all I can think of is the cold, icy unfairness of life,
The rules imposed on people in order for them to escape certain situations
As I listen to Lacrimosa and wish for my own Requiem mass.

Isn’t it amazing how a girl can walk home, tears bursting down her face,
With no one giving her a second glance?
I hide my red eyes under the white fur trim of my hood,
Sniffling the only sign of distress.
The facial contortions begin as my soul is ripped to shreds
Like a piece of tissue paper.

All I want is to graduate
But a black beast stands between me and my freedom.
I try to fight it but I’m always left in a heap in the corner,
Weeping uncontrollably, hand pressed to leaking red forehead.

How I beg the cars to run me over,
How I long to have mono,
To have Crohn’s,
To be a vegetable!
Anything but this.

Why do I have do go through scourge and suffering,
Like a cat thrown in the ocean,
Forced to take a course I despise,
In order to graduate?
Save me.
Please save me.
What will I tell my father?
I will perish.
Miserere mei, magister.