The Happy Hot Dog

Saddona, Sadstate was a sad, sad town. The town folk spent their days scrubbing toilets and picking up endless piles of dog poop from the groups of wild and unfriendly beagles that came through town multiple times a day. They ate nothing but Broccoli and spinach sandwiches. The never hugged their family members and they didn’t have any loveable furry pets. They all wore black trench coats and black socks with poorly crocheted black hats. The grass stayed an unhealthy brown and the trees were bare. It rained all the time and stayed a frigid temperature of 33.5 degrees.

 

But one magical day, an egg fell from the sky and into a soft bush full of barbeque sauce. The egg was small and a light shade of violet. It was bumpy to touch and smelled like cotton candy. The citizens all had an equal amount of hatred for barbeque sauce, so they never  noticed the unusual mystery egg.

 

The egg grew a little each day in length and finally, on the fourteenth day the precious egg cracked, and a hot dog was born. The hot dog was long and beautiful, he had smooth red skin and was wrapped in a fluffy tan and white bun. Immediately, upon opening his eyes, the rain stopped raining in Saddona, for the first time in forever.

 

Citizens working outdoors with the poo, stopped for a moment and took a long puzzling look at the sky. They didn’t understand. The gray clouds were rolling and a large yellow orb was revealed. They were shocked. They knew of the sun, but they had never seen it so bright and beautiful. They never saw the sky such a beautiful blue.

 

The grinning hot dog lifted himself up and peered at the inside of the pale purple shell. He was about 13 inches tall and had bony stick-like limbs. He walked the dreary sidewalks and instantly the grass changed from an ugly stale yellowish color and turned lush, soft, and green.

 

“MY NAME IS WINSTON, AND I LOVE LIFE!” the hot dog cried. He began to run all around Saddona and after an hour of running, the whole town was warmer, up to an unusual sixty four degrees. The town folk both picking up poop and scrubbing toilets were all outside, pondering the new climate for a moment. Even the beagles stopped running and pooping and looked up at the sky and at the beautiful grass. Flowers started popping up, Daffodils, tiger lilies, roses, and violets; Tulips, daises, Peonies and every other possible flower that anyone could ever imagine filled the town, making it look lovely and colorful.

 

Sadman Saddington, the town mayor, was puzzled and decided to call a meeting. All townsmen and the beagles came and sat in the town hall and waited for the mayor’s explanation. The mayor stood at the podium for a moment, still puzzled and trying to think of what he could say, when all of a sudden, Winston knocked on the town hall door.

 

An old man, named Don opened the wooden door and Winston burst in the room and skipped jovially to the podium. He hopped on top of it and screamed  at the people.

 

“I love life!”

 

Instantly, the beautiful joyfull hot dog brought smiles to the peoples’ faces. They looked at one another and grinned.

For the first time in their entire lives they felt overwhelming urges to hug their families. Even the beagles smiled, wagged their tails, and each of them found a family to be a part of. Children were laughing, women were giggling, and men were chuckling. They all high fived and started smacking each other joyfully with fish.

 

Winston laughed along with them and gave Sadman Saddington a fist pump. Winston then broke out in an upbeat peppy tune, and the whole town began to square dance. They danced until the wee hours of the night until they could dance no more. Instead of going back to their homes, they had a sleep over and slept comfortably on the town hall floor, talking about life until they fell asleep.

 

Things finally began to change in Saddona. No longer did the people have to pick up endless piles of poop. They decided that the toilets were clean enough and got real jobs. They followed their dreams and reached their potential. Families laughed and hugged each other often, they played games like twister every night instead of sitting alone in their rooms and reading the dictionary before bed time.

 

Meanwhile Winston the joyful hot dog continued to spread joy around the town. He laughed constantly and when he wasn’t proclaiming his love for life, he was writing songs about it and singing them to everyone he met.

At night, while the citizens slept Winston worked endlessly on knitting each of the members of the town a new outfit. Cheerful red shirts, bright pairs of yellow pants, and perfectly knit purple hats. He gave out the outfits every day and that made Saddona even more bright and sunny and joyful.

 

Mayor Saddington announced at the next meeting through his deep chuckle that Saddona would no longer be called Saddona and he would no longer be called Sadman Saddington. Saddona was now Joyston and he was now to be addressed as Sir Carl.

 

Each and every day there was a new joy discovered. Slip and Slides. Roller rinks. Snow. Changing leaves. Four leaf clovers. Hopscotch. Scrapbooks. Wool Blankets. Petting Zoos. Mattress Pads. Monopoly. Hungry, Hungry Hippos. Kittens. Beagle puppies. Roller Coasters.

 

One thing Winston showed the townfolk that they rejected, was new food. They were purely content with their broccoli and spinach sandwiches. Winston just shook his hot dog head, smiled, and screamed, “I LOVE LIFE!”

 

On one fateful day, an outsider came to town. She was on a road trip and got hungry, and was in search for a place to eat. It was eight p.m. and Winston was taking a nap in the barbeque bush. The hungry woman, whos name was callie, drove around Joyston and looked for a place that served something other than spinach and broccoli sandwiches. She almost gave up when she suddenly got a whiff of sweet smelling barbeque sauce.

 

She pulled over, enticed by the smell, and found the barbeque bushes. She peered down in them and saw the tastiest looking hot dog she had ever seen sleeping in a purple shell. She nudged the hot dog and Winston awoke instantly with a grin.

 

“Hi, my name is Winston, I LOVE LIFE.”

 

Callie grinned back at the tasty slab of meat and bun and got out her and mustard packets. She picked Winston up and he continued to smile, thinking she just wanted a hug.

 

She smeared the condiment on Winston.

 

“Gee, thanks, I’ve always thought I look great in yellow!” Winston started to sing one of his songs but before he could get to the chorus, Callie had bitten off his lower half.

 

Winston winced, wondering how he would skip after he had no legs, but his love for life overwhelmed the slight worry.

Callie continued to eat. Winston continued to smile. When Callie got to the last bite he cried out one last time, “My name is Winston, and I love-“

Callie chewed the hot dog, got in her car, and continued on to her destination.

 

The End.

Reviews

[Mark]

Oh, I think you must surely be Lewis Carroll's granddaughter! This is TOO strange! Literally laughed out loud more than once. The very notion of being saved from terminal boredom by a talking weiner, born in a BBQ bush out of a purple egg, and who is himself then consumed in turn, is just psychedelic! Excellent farce!