Hand-In-Hand

My very first Sonnet ever. This Sonnet is about the forever remembered love for a mother or grandmother. remembered.

Hand-In-Hand....

Her tired eyes saw more than I'll ever know;

long silv'ry hair piled high upon her head,

the clean fresh scent of times so long ago ...

warm stinging tears are those I often shed.

Remembering her laughter through our years,

when we walked hand in hand along the shore.

As lovely sounds of church bells filled my ears,

my love still held by ocean's distant roar.

Now, fresh white, fragrant lilies near her lie,

a few soft petals fallen from the rain ...

their faces wet, turned up toward the sky;

along with them she takes rest from her pain. 

Sweet memories we shared now mean so much,

each day, I long for her caressing touch.

                                   ~~~

                                     

Author's Note

A very special thank you to Richard!! Who saw this as a Sonnet (I had no idea what a Sonnet even was!!) and, helped me complete it. He opened up a whole new world to me.
Thank you,
Lisa

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

This was particularly touching to me. I was the primary caregiver for my mother the last five years of her life. It was the hardest and most challenging task I have ever undertaken. Given the chance, I'd gladly do it all again. By her grave, I was almost too exhausted to cry. But I found great comfort in knowing her worldly suffering had come an end even though I know I will miss her until we meet again. Thank you for this, I enjoyed. F.

[Lisasview]

Thank you Fabian,
I am glad you liked it.
My plan is to rework my Sonnet so please look for it again.
I too took care of my mother for several years.
And, of my father in law and also my step mother.
Loads of work but I would never trade it. For the precious time I spent with them will be in my memory forever.

[Lisasview]

Hi Fabian, Just submitted my newest version of this poem and I also submitted one that I am working on.
Hoping you have time to look at them.
Lisa

[Susan 🦋]

I owe you a review Lisa. Your sonnet is absolutely amazing. Did you say your first??? I am certainly impressed. The imagery is quite lovely and you also have it perfectly illustrated. Well done 💐

[Lisasview]

Hi Susan,
This is so so weird, I am going back over my reviews to make sure each person got a thank you from me. I was so sure I had already checked Hand~In~Hand and thanked everyone but I see now that for some strange reason you were never thanked.
Yes, this was my very first sonnet and, the very first time I ever put anything on any site..let alone let anyone read my work... A new and exciting experience for me..for sure. Thank you so much for your lovely review. Hope my thank you goes through...
Lisa, still in Spain

[Betty Hermelee]

a beautiful ode to a loved one who suffered with pain. and, the caretaker very often suffers with as well. My mother suffered for 5 years with Parkison's Disease which affected her movement and her brain; so painful to watch. When suffering has passed, a certain sense of peace ensues; then the memories shroud you with all kinds of emotions. Nice write.
Best, B

[Lisasview]

Never ending our love for our mothers, grandmothers... wishing they were still here to enjoy what we are experiencing... this is what really make me oh so sad....

[Betty Hermelee]

I totally understand.

[William Michael Reeves]

Amazing! I have been thinking about sonnets a lot these last few days. Decided to read your poetry and look what I found! And then I read your notes and just like you have been tutored by Richard and going to try to get mine right. Richard is invaluable. And you didn't even know what a sonnet was? I'd be interested in seeing the original. This version is beautiful!

[Lisasview]

I am so happy you enjoyed my poem, William... Yes, very first one and I really barely changed it... Mainly punctuation, some words and syllables...Richard has been so amazing in helping me .If you like you can private message me and I will send you my original.
Did you read my second Sonnet.. Pearls..? You might like that as well..
Thank you for your kind review...
Lisa

[olla]

this is really good.. once I stopped trying to read it in a rhyming tempo.. I have no idea why I got so stuck on that.. it is prose poetry and read properly it is truly touching.. I had those kinds of relationships in my lifetime.. I could only wish that every one had as well..

[Lisasview]

Good morning Olla,
Actually this is a Sonnet..not prose... It is in 10 syllable count, Iambic form.
Thank you for you kind review..
Lisa, now in Spain

[olla]

thank you for that information.. I am not that schooled on different styles.. I actually didn't start writing until a few years ago.. I will have to try the syllable count..

[Lisasview]

Okay.. you just need to make sure of the count.. some words seem to be two counts but they are actually on one count..ofcourse with Sonnets there are loads more of consideration..
Until 2 months ago i knew absolutely nothing about Sonnests..Learning now at my older age..
Lisa

[olla]

thanks for that tip.. I'll keep it in mind..

[Lisasview]

Great such fun to share tips...

[sabinn]

Oh it's wonderful how you described the feeling we have, the love, the care for our mother and grandmother well this particular poetry gave me a cinematic preview of the time that I had with my grand parents. This was short but played a soothing movie of the memories in my head. Thank you sir for such good writing.

[Lisasview]

Thank you so much for reading and enjoying my poem
Lisa

[JE Falcon]

This is such a warm and endearing sonnet. It pushes all the right buttons to relate to the many, and more importantly, to you.

[Lisasview]

Hi there,
I am going back over all my poems and checking to make sure I have thanked everyone for their review... I thought for sure I had checked this one Hand~In~Hand (the very first Sonnet I ever posted) and I found your very kind and thoughtful review...so thank you very much.
Lisa, now in Spain

[JE Falcon]

Thank you.

[Lisasview]

You are most welcome!

[Aluppi Jampur]

A very touching poem, Lisa.
Visually presentation is beautiful as well.

[Lisasview]

Hi Chrome,
Please forgive me for not responding sooner but life often gets in the way..
Thank you so much for taking the time to read my very first Sonnet..I submitted it when I first found Writers Cafe..about two or so months ago..
Lisa, now in Spain

[DIVYA]

Mothers and grandmothers are so precious. Losing them means losing our greatest treasure.
A sonnet so beautiful to read and to feel. Lovely imagery and such fluid verses, a reader's delight!

[Lisasview]

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my poem. This was the very first poem I ever submitted anywhere...

[Zoe Richardson]

What a beautiful tribute! I thought of my own grandmother, who kept her hair piled high on her head and filled my life with laughter. Her first name was Lillie, so the images of lilies brought her readily to mind. I sense the sadness of your loss and the love that still ties you together. Well done!

[Lisasview]

Thank you for your review..
This poem was for my grandmother and mother..
My grandmother passed away in 1963.. I was 15 years old.. I still think of her quite often.. My mother left this world at the age of 85..and the was in 2007...Terrible loss..
Lisa..

[Zoe Richardson]

My mother is 92. Her mother lived to be 99. I know what you mean. Losing the women who had such influence and provided such infinite love... it's hard to overcome.

[Lisasview]

Wow, long life..so amazing..
Lisa

[Davidgeo]

There is a great deal of beauty in you lisa.

[Lisasview]

What a very lovely thing to say Tk..
So appreciated..
Lisa