The hurt here is palpable and leaves the reader wondering what the cause of the sustained anguish might be; the death of a spouse perhaps? We do ascertain that the relationship was sustained for " so many years" so naturally we deduce that the depth of feeling was mutual. But we are left with the sense that the object of pain and desire might be "back around" leading us to think of a broken relationship or a ghost perhaps. This was an intriguing write. Thank you for sharing.
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Hi Fabian,
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review my little poem... To be h.. read moreHi Fabian,
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review my little poem... To be honest I have no idea where this poem came from... I got up one morning and felt a pressure to write it... Perhaps it is about my past loves and losses?? All within me...Sadly, I relate to my poem although now and for the past 40 years I have been in a relationship with no goodbyes... But before then I had so many almost long term loves..
Thank you for saying that this was an intriguing write... really means a lot to me. And, inspires me!
Lisa, finally on the computer after a long, long day day
Oh this one is so gut wrenchingly beautiful! Each stanza hits hard. "pulse-beats quicken at mere thoughts of a sound." This is my favorite line. And I love the final couplet it just binds it all together. Amazing job, Lisa!
Oh gosh thank you for reading and reviewing. I was quite young when I went through this... Pretty p.. read moreOh gosh thank you for reading and reviewing. I was quite young when I went through this... Pretty painful... but time has a great way of healing...
Lisa
1 Year Ago
It's funny how I'm now around the same age you were when you wrote this, and I find this poem so rel.. read moreIt's funny how I'm now around the same age you were when you wrote this, and I find this poem so relatable to me.
1 Year Ago
Ahhh, to be young and have to advantage of a computer, etc. All my work is either in pencil or pen .. read moreAhhh, to be young and have to advantage of a computer, etc. All my work is either in pencil or pen on scraps of odd paper. I began writing when I was 10 years old, when I wrote a 3 page story... Never had any schooling in writing stories or poems...
Basically learned from doing...
Lisa
I feel sad just reading this, the description of loss and the impact on the subject are palpable.
I just noticed two reviews both used the word palpable!
Posted 1 Year Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
1 Year Ago
Hi Michael,
As I am going back over my reviews for all my work... a big job... I noticed that.. read moreHi Michael,
As I am going back over my reviews for all my work... a big job... I noticed that I neglected to thank you for taking the time to read and reviewing my work!
Lisa, now in Spain
1 Year Ago
No thanks required the gift is given unconditionally.
This is truly where the painting draws in the reader in and commands that he read through to the end. Exquisite painting, lonesome words and longing....
BIG LIKE
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
1 Year Ago
This is so crazy Blunt~
How could all the thank you messages I sent to you not be showing up... read moreThis is so crazy Blunt~
How could all the thank you messages I sent to you not be showing up... So weird..
Anyway I am delighted once again that you liked my words..
Lisa
Hi Lisa, hope everything is fine with you. When I saw the picture of this writing, a painting if Van Gogh came to my mind about a pregnant and depressed woman. Break-ups are always sad, because most of the times the friendship is gone too. This poem impressed me emotionally.
Nicely penned.
Nima, somewhere in Persia
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Hi Nima,
I am moved that you were affected by my poem. I feel so lucky to have found the per.. read moreHi Nima,
I am moved that you were affected by my poem. I feel so lucky to have found the perfect image to represent the true feeling I had when I wrote this. You are so right Nima.. when there is a break-up the friendship is usually gone.
Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to review.
Lisa, now in Tarragona, Spain..everything is fine..thank you for asking.
Such an emotional, heart tugging read. You express yourself very well
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Hi there,
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my poem. I appreciate it very much!read moreHi there,
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my poem. I appreciate it very much!
Lisa, one train in 🇪🇸 Spain
So mournful and full of the lament of loss. It is so fluid and even in tone. You did a splendid job on this one. You need to be proud of it for sure. Getting help from Richard is always a great idea, he has helped most of us out a time or two. Great work!
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Thank you Crowley for your excellent review.
Reviews are so important and I appreciate that y.. read moreThank you Crowley for your excellent review.
Reviews are so important and I appreciate that you took the time to read and review mine.
You might like the one I wrote.... Innocence.
Lisa, early morning in Spain
Lonesome Blues are Cries in the Night…. among the Whippoorwills and the Chills of Ice on Moonlit Hills… bring memories of a Hot Tea Kettle whistling on the 💜 Hearth… Autumn 🍂 leaves and Wild Geese flying in formation … as He disappeared in flurries of Snow. I will grow fonder of the Candles lit with Prayers rendered like Bread Crumbs on a Path to be remembered. gently, Pat
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Hi Pat, Thank you once again for finding one of my poems and leaving such an amazing review. Your re.. read moreHi Pat, Thank you once again for finding one of my poems and leaving such an amazing review. Your reviews are like poems themselves... I know I have said this to you before...
Really do appreciate you,
Lisa, now in Spain
2 Years Ago
dearest Lisa… the Autumn is inspiring and I am thinking of Apple Pie and wedges of sharp Cheese as.. read moredearest Lisa… the Autumn is inspiring and I am thinking of Apple Pie and wedges of sharp Cheese as we feel the Breeze through the trees… be blessed. gently, Pat
Oh my that does sound so delicious.
I am working hard on my new Sonnet..really quite a challe.. read moreOh my that does sound so delicious.
I am working hard on my new Sonnet..really quite a challenge.
Hope all is well with you and your family,
Lisa
2 Years Ago
I will be looking for your Sonnet… it almost seems like you are a Composer of 🎶 Music with 🎻.. read moreI will be looking for your Sonnet… it almost seems like you are a Composer of 🎶 Music with 🎻 Violins… tenderly, Pat
2 Years Ago
Well, dear Pa.. I began piano for the very first time when I was 50 years old... and, I still practi.. read moreWell, dear Pa.. I began piano for the very first time when I was 50 years old... and, I still practise nearly ever day and take weeks lessons... I hope to get my Sonnet posted very soon.
Thank you,
Lisa
It is all so descriptive. The dreaming, the longing, the sad walk to the window, the sad recollecting. If you haven't lived it you certainly will in reading this lovely, but so sad, poem.
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Wow Bryan, I am so delighted to know you were moved by my poem. I woke up one morning and felt a ver.. read moreWow Bryan, I am so delighted to know you were moved by my poem. I woke up one morning and felt a very strong need to write this done..I do wonder where my thoughts come from... They just seem to appear.
I so appreciate your great review.
Lisa, now in Spain
This is one of those poems that just poured out of me and, only needed a little tweaking..
Th.. read moreThis is one of those poems that just poured out of me and, only needed a little tweaking..
Thank you again for reviewing my words...
Lisa, need to spend some time writing...
2 Years Ago
Hi there,
Rereading your lovely review.. I am wondering what you meant when you said "I also .. read moreHi there,
Rereading your lovely review.. I am wondering what you meant when you said "I also liked the word play of: “for, never…”
Thank you,
Lisa
2 Years Ago
I thought it somewhat alluded to 'forever'. Except, though sounding a bit similar if read quickly, i.. read moreI thought it somewhat alluded to 'forever'. Except, though sounding a bit similar if read quickly, it meant the exact opposite.
Crying is such a therapeutic thing, but sometimes when you just can’t stop crying it can feel like you’re drowning. I feel that despair here in these words and just the heartache and needing to curl in bed. The emotions and pain are so palpable, and the words add to the beauty of it. It’s such a visually striking poem, it reminds me of a storm and maybe that works because of the storm of emotions you were able to produce. It’s beautifully written and thank you so much for sharing such an inspiring piece.
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Wow, what an amazing and insightful review Cat.
I woke up one morning and just rote it all ou.. read moreWow, what an amazing and insightful review Cat.
I woke up one morning and just rote it all out.
Not a comfortable feeling t write about...and even now as I read again it is so very painful.
I felt this way once upon a time... Luckily that is all behind me now.
I so appreciate that you always leave me such great reviews,
Lisa, in hot Spain
I have been writing poetry and short stories since I was 10..so 64 years!
I have never connected with any groups but recently thought why not..
So here I ..looking at where this adventure leads me. more..