Automatic

"automatic" poetry

Built for roughhousing youthful jerk tech
front teeth gone out-of-line knocked out
by supersonic infantrymen or coaches AKA
the rolling waters of whispered victories
defeat being taken at a pace softer than
poetry

Reviews

[Trigorin]

Not bad. Good use of imagery and you've made some unconventional choices here which is always nice to see. I think the 'AKA' might not fit - stands out a bit too much. Other than that, good work.