Waiting

Waiting

A Poem by Penulis Kecil
"

First thing I've written in months...

"

it's the not-knowing that does it.

 

we slip under the water,

draw bubbles around us

to pretend we're breathing

and suck in oxygen

thick with hope

through gills we dreamed

we had.

 

eventually, we'll let go of dreams

and take hold of hands.

 

we'll tell each other it doesn't matter in the end

when you get there, nothing matters

except that I am with you

and you are with me

remind ourselves that in the end

nothing matters

as long as we are together.

 

these are the currents

that will buoy us to the surface

later.

 

we'll drink the air like lemonade.

© 2012 Penulis Kecil


Author's Note

Penulis Kecil
All polite/relevant reviews are welcome - especially constructive critique, but also including grammar and spelling corrections. Please be aware, though, that this poem is intentionally written entirely in lowercase. And thank you for reading/leaving a review!

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Reviews

I like the breathe water/drink air imagery, as well as the let go of dreams/take hold of hands. The 'later' on its own line is a bit throwing, it seems almost to belong to the next stanza. And since you asked: 'buoy'

Posted 10 Years Ago


Penulis Kecil

9 Years Ago

Thank you!

I agree with the comment re the "later" - I think I'm just not sure which li.. read more

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366 Views
1 Review
Added on June 21, 2012
Last Updated on September 22, 2012
Tags: drowning, emotion, overwhelmed, relationship

Author

Penulis Kecil
Penulis Kecil

Caboolture, Australia



About
I'm a 29 year old Australian woman who has, like most people, experienced a number of things in life. I think I'm pretty friendly, if a little odd and silly. When I'm not writing, I enjoy other cre.. more..

Writing