Roller Coaster

Up and down
In and out
All around

Goes my heart

Always exciting
Yet frightening
Railed with anticipation

Of the next drop

The highs are my favorite
Abundant with possibilities

Dreams so close to being realized

But the lows are so deep
My stomach plunges

Fear abounds

Will it end?
Can it stabilize?

Or are we doomed to live out our days
On this wonderful terrible ride

Reviews

[Brenda Caballero]

I like the questions you asked in the second to last stanza. WIll it end? Can it stabilize? I think those two questions are simple yet interesting because if you read this poem metaphorically, you want both. You don't want it to end, and some part of you does. You want it to stabilize, but you're curious of what will happen if it doesn't. The ying/yang thing going on with this poem is great.

Now for constructive criticism! I think you can add more depth to it. I felt like it could've gone deeper, in the sense that the words were very on the surface...(I'm trying to find an example of this and explain it!)....

For example, where you wrote "But the lows are so deep/My stomach drops/The awfulness". Maybe there you could've grasped the reader with more dramatic phrases or even went more into that awful feeling. We've all felt it, but when you write it's good to make the reader feel it again with as little effort as possible.

Otherwise, this poem was fun and exciting to read :)

[Persephone]

I know, I don't think it's finished quite yet - Thanks for reading :)

[Alexx Wake]

"..wonderful terrible ride"
My favorite line in your work.
This poem can be read in different ways, but I feel like everyone in some form or another can relate.
Good read!

[Persephone]

Thank you :)

[Baby Ricochet]

This could be taken literally or metaphorically. Roller Coaster, Hot Romance, whichever way you read it it's a great little poem. It's good to see you again Persephone. You've been a stranger for to long.

[Persephone]

Thanks for reading ricochet, its good to be back :)