Georgia River

I can see the running water

in the river and the colourful fish

who live in it.

The faint sound of Blue Jays,

Robins, Ravens, and Woodpeckers

fills the air.

I lean against an old tree,

and I can feel the roughness of the brown

bark on my back.

I dip my small feet into the ice cold water,

and it rapidly sends chills up my spine.

The warm spring air begins to blow,

and to warm me up,

but hte smiling face in the sky does a better job.

The small rays pop through the

open areas in the woods,

and warms my face nad arms.

As I look across the river,

I see a doe drinking from it.

My heart glows with love,

and the once faint smile,

upon my tine and pale face,

grow rapidly into a larger and mroe dramatic one.

I walk down along the river bank,

and I sit on a slimy moss covered rock,

and an old and fathful oak tree.

I shove my feet into the

cold and gushy mudd, and I can

feel the suction all over my feet.

I look around and I can see

some large nad small turtles

gliding down the river.

Amazing what lies in nad around

a Georgia River.

 

Reviews

[N3v3r_2_L@t3]

Wow this is so beautiful. I can practically see what you see in the Georgia river. I myself live in georgia, and its nice to see someone actually appreciate the beauty of the south instead of calling us a bunch of hicks. =p. You had great description in this poem also. It made me feel like I was actually there, basking in the warm sun, my feet playing in the cool water...There were a couple grammar mistakes, but I'm sure you made that during typing. All you have to do is switch letters around. Don't worry, I do that all the time. I'm like a super fast typer and I don't really pay attention all the time. Thats the only thing that I see you need to work on though, and its just a matter of checking after yourself. Overall, great poem, keep up the great work and welcome to writers' cafe=] If you have any questions, ask me. I think you have great potential as a writer=]

[Michael Carr]

upon my tine and pale face, -- not sure if tine is a real word. did you mean tiny?
the flows a tad rough in patches but nothing major.
I thought it was great. the piece creates a genuine sence of wonder towards the beauty and grace of the majestic river.
very nice.

[Steffi]

I really liked the imagery you used in this piece it was really well done.
Another good write

[Sarah]

Oh my, birds galore! How did I miss this one?! Beautiful imagery, how I wish I could be there~ Great job once more! ;)