What does depression feel like?

TW: depressi0n, de@th, su1c1dal th0ughts, sh

So, you want to know what depression feels like?

Well, you’ve come to the right place. Here take a seat, let me explain to you.

Depression isn’t a feeling or an emotion it’s more like an emptiness. Remember when you were a kid and you got ice cream from the ice cream truck but it was hot and it melted so you were upset? That emptiness you felt, that doesn’t even begin to compare. When you have depression you feel like your carrying around a heavy metal ball on your ankle with a chain like your in a prison cell. The prison cell of your own mind. Your trapped. No escapes. It feels like this has to be the only way, everyone yells no and don’t do it because “your worth it” and “its going to get better” but when will it get better? If I was worth it then why did nobody realise before. Nobody really cares until your dead anyway. Those pills sitting there calling my name, begging me to take them now while nobody is around. That tree I walk past every morning to go to school whispers to me telling me to just get that rope and end it all. I can’t escape any of this, this is the only way out. Ignorant fools take you as a joke when you say your depressed, they tell you that your just sad and your too young to be depressed. Well if only that was true, 6 years old is too young for a little girl to be feeling this emptiness inside. 6 years gone by and she wants to just get rid of her life. She doesn’t care anymore and she’s had enough. She goes to her parents and gives them a big hug. They say goodnight for the  final time. Little do they know that their princess is about to end it all. Takes the bottle as she walks past and slips it into her pocket. Asks for some water when she goes to bed so she can see her family one last time before she goes. She pours the pills into her hand silently sobbing wishing this didn’t have to happen. She opened her mouth and swallowed the pills as she took her last few breaths. Her parents blame themselves, her friends wish they noticed, the teachers feel guilty because they ‘should have seen the signs’ but they didn’t because she was just too young to feel depressed. At her funeral everyone cries but she wishes that they had seen all the signs, all her cries for help, anything to get them to pay attention to her instead of assuming she had heard the word depression and was putting on a show for attention because that’s what 6 year old girls do. They hear unfamiliar words and they put on a play. that's what's expected of them these days. They use their imagination while they still have it. But in today’s society, everyone is depressed.