SEARCHING FOR THE MEANING OF LIFE on my 26th BIRTHDAY

I sat there alone in my 26^th birthday with my solitude to accompany me in a park watching carelessly amid people walking, laughing, giggling, standing, eating and humming songs too, but with some solemnity at the same time. I wasn’t sad, but neither was I juvenile. I just wanted to be all along with myself. Just one of those days when you get all blues and stuff, and get all philosophical and kind of weird too to some extent. Questioning life, love, hatred, passion, knowledge, existence and LIFE itself? Thinking, where and why life or for that matter I have taken my life towards. I wondered whether I was the one living my life or was it life which was taking me in. It was more of the latter, which meant I was just letting life happen upon me.

Was I scared? Is it a cowardly act which I have been performing? I didn’t know the answer.

Then to break this overtime use of my neurons, I lighted a cigarette and plugged in my earphones in full blast (Let there be Rock-AC/DC). I took my pirated 150 buck SHANTARAM and started it from where I had left the other day. It was marked by a piece of paper which was once given to me as a token of love by love itself (with some lines of romanticity scribbled upon it). Amidst the music, people, SHANTARAM my mind was still somehow stuck upon the thought about LIFE and the miss-doings I’d done with it, from it and ofcourse for it. Nevertheless, I knew it was still flowing along. I’d read it somewhere that once Robert Frost famously said, “All I learned from life after all these years is, it goes on.” So I knew it would. But, for how long? How long before remorse would cloak me and my soul upon completely?

Someway amid all these thoughts, my eyes caught one woman coming from far away. She was wearing a red sari, covering her head and her teeth clinching it too. She had a little kid on the right side of her waist as if carrying a mutka of water like women does in our country. She crossed herself in from the border divided by little pink, white and yellow flowers onto the open lush green side, where I had sat myself. I looked at her with some curiosity and closed my book and brushed it aside. I wanted to see what was she there for? I folded my arms and leaned upon the old bamboo rack behind me.

I saw how beautiful she was. She wasn’t one of those hot-shots of our town who was there for more of a class show off, but she was an ordinary, working class woman. Yet she presented herself with utmost dignity. She then put her little kid upon the lush greenery. So as soon as that kid felt land beneath his feet, he ran. He ran gathering all of his strength. He didn’t care for the world amid, but his little steps were brisk and he ran with pleasure and joy. That woman watched her little kid hurl off with a smile on her face, arms folded and one finger upon the right-side of her chin. As the little kid was toddling away he was nearing a stair which led to a little resting hut (which we call as chowtara), which could bring an abrupt stop to his sprint and may be a loss of tooth. Seeing this, that woman ran in horror and in split of a second she grabbed her and took the kid in her arms. She embraced and kissed her kid. Then she went away.

I lay there still sitting myself, music was still to my ears only this time it was Heavy Hours by Crooked Fingers. I was hit by something seeing all this. I didn’t know what, but as if I found my answer to my queries about life. Could this be possible? The event which I saw just now, which could have been mundane for me given any other day, could be the way to my answer. I thought, is LIFE itself something relevant to what I saw. Is the real meaning of Life, sprinting. Running may be not from the reality but just running away and running along. Flowing along? That care free sprint just like that little kid, with sheer joy and pleasure. It needs not to be in the path of righteousness, path of glory, path of success and for that matter even path of happiness. Nor it needs to be highway to hell. But the real purpose and meaning of life is to just run and go along. Consequence comes later. But then one day, one moment, one instant you reach that stair just like the kid which could bring a stop and even devastation. Challenging me. A point which could lead to disaster. But there will always be someone for me to grab and lift me, kiss me and embrace me just like the woman of the child.

And again, I was awestruck by another perilous question. By whom? Family? Friend? Love of my Life? Who? But then I realized, it was Life itself which would grab me, lift me, kiss me and embrace me and stop me from faltering and falling.

 So I realized that all the queries, meaning and purpose of LIFE is LIFE itself.

 

Reviews

[Red Raven]

thats some thinking you did. Life do goes on. the woman you saw in its simplest beauty if the core of life in it itself. glad that you hv appreciated it.
Shantaram is indeed a very strong book to read. i have read atleast 5 times. the green cover now lies with traces of folding crack but it again act as a second dictionary for me. whenever my brain itches i just took it out from my shelf and open any damn page and pick up my read . every time i re read it, it reveals the mystery of life in different form.
Glad that you appreciate life. It is a beautiful read. Thank you for sharing.

[Deepankar]

Thank you very much... Yes indeed Shantaram is one of my favourite too.

[Lady of the Lake]

Wooow, this was good! I always appreciate "philosophical" stories and thoughts. I really liked this particular story because I could relate to it, as I've thought about LIFE (I liked the caps haha) before, but I liked reading about the character's (you?) revelation about life because I felt you took an interesting spin on the whole idea. I've heard before that "Life is a marathon" or something like that, and the whole "go with the flow" thing, which is sort of what you looked at, but it was sort of done with a fresh pair of eyes, I think, with a different way of seeing it all. I don't know. I just really liked this :) The title, 'Searching for the Meaning of Life on my 26th Birthday", caught my eye, that's for sure. I had a teacher in high school who told me to never give a short story a long title, but I completely disagree. I love longer titles; they give more information and draw your reader in (typically). And yours did that.
So well done :)

[Deepankar]

Oh thank You very much......
I was always intrigued by LIFE and its reason for me as a gift..... I try to pen down the thoughts aroused, n hope I'd succeeded upon it. My only wish is to improve on my thoughts and the way to express it.... Hope someday I'll get there... :)
Once again thank U for the review...............

[Lady of the Lake]

No problem! Keep up the good work! :)