Light as a Feather

My thoughts for today

This morning found me mellowed out in my room, surrounded by nothing else but a couple of memories from my high school. Love notes, manuscripts of unfinished novels, my prom programmes where I was the emcee, and lots and lots of stage plays. I never did grow up.

 

Some people say the greatest memories are still waiting out there, waiting for us to live our life the only way we know how. I would beg to differ. I guess my great memories are already here in my head.

 

Some people say grade school was the greatest time of their life. Mine was okay but I found my high school a greater experience. For all it’s worth, I had more thrown at me during my teenage years. My firsts and my lasts, my true friends, my unrelenting rivals and critics, and of course, I would never forget the thousand smiles I was able to capture in moments that will never be forgotten.

 

I am a romantic soul. That’s why I had more girls around me than I had fellow brutes. Some would call that gay. I’ve no problem with that. That’s their opinion and as ignorant as that may sound, they are entitled to their own expression like I am with mine.

 

One thing that made me think while rummaging through the mountains of paper I called my memory pile was that in every story or idea that I had, I had my friends as my characters. They were there in every writing I had. Most often, as my vanity would mold my main character from my own image, my girls would always be my hero’s love interests.

 

My stories revolved around my group of friends, modified with fantasy and a whole lot of other lies. Different names, different hair styles, different backgrounds or histories. But the resemblances were as blatant as my handwriting was unreadable.

 

As my scope went broader, my vanity was pushed aside to make way for my best friend as the main good guy. My character, molded from my personality and being, become the main antagonist and most often was a girl.

 

I found it hard to continue and finish any one of my creations because, as my friends became more aware of my stories involving them, my characters would always find something wrong with their characters and they would offer a lot of changes that made the whole point of the story null. And as I wanted to impress them all that much, playing the “force the author some changes” game was an everyday struggle.

 

And as I recall those days when they would come up to me and ask or beg me to change some stuff about their avatars, I couldn’t stop smiling.

 

They were a good bunch, strange and varied characters really. There were a lot of possibilities with their characters, as I saw them, and there were pretty much a lot of possible conflicts and romance.

 

All this time, I’ve been thinking about them as the most important pieces in my life. I was caught up with impressing them and trying to keep them in my corner forever. But nothing lasts forever and as a writer, an artist with emotions as his tool, I know that better than anyone else.

 

I’ve been holding on when I could have been doing a lot of other things. I could always keep in touch with them but I would never be able to be with all of them. I would never forget them. They are a part of me, a part of this head and body. If they forget about me, that’s ok. They have their own freedom and no one, especially not me, can force them to forget or remember anybody.  

 

Like what an old friend of mine always says, “There are only two things in life: holding on and letting go…”

 

It’s time for me to let go. How else would I be able to move on?

Author's Note

is the font different? XD

Image Disclaimer: I do not own the image included. I just found that it suited my piece so there you go. Special thanks to the original artist.

Reviews

[Butch Decatoria]

I dig your style, very personal or personable - either or - still captures the grandeur of your feelings. This piece you wrote, I very much can relate to it's premise, that in-between life leading to god-knows-what, I've been there - there on that ledge, looking out for some sort of answer (to a question I don't even know what to ask...). It is a great write, and it's a great writer who can always question himself, and that which surrounds him, will always have something to say... With Gusto!!

Thank you for sharing this. I am now a fan.

~PFluffer~
(aka Cassidy)

[Imperfection]

Interesting title.

This is written with a lot of sincerity. I admire that.
What I like about this piece is also the fact that some portions of it took me back to incidents in my past.

There are only two things in life: holding on and letting go�"

Very true. But it is so hard to hold on to happiness and to let go of pain.

[Kara Emily Krantz]

i really liked this. it read so well, a great blog-type of writing, but with a poetic and even more personal flair.

"But the resemblances were as blatant as my handwriting was unreadable."

loved that line.

what this made me think of , personally, was... how sometimes it is so hard to write from experience. even though that is where we are the most profound, and most authentic...

but it's scary, because as a writer we also need support, and that support often comes from friends and family. so it makes it virtually impossible to write about them, because we know as we're writing that they're going to judge what we're saying...

i dont know. thats what i was thinking about.

high school wasn't the highlight of my life, though. i was also thinking about that LOL
hopefully the highlight of my life is still to come.

hugs

[Phil Sanders]

Well written and personally emotive .. very good ...

[Mel Stevens]

No, the font is the same.

This piece seems...and don't take this the wrong way, but...I feel this writing is closer to your true self than anything else I have read so far. I feel in touch with you, as a person, not a writer, from this piece. Like you have bared your soul, no holds barred.

It's very good. I can't help but think how much you remind me of my friend from high school...

[Jazlean]

I read this in ya blog.

Jofer...

...I support you.

your honesty is amazing. You are amazing. Never ever forget that. You will get over this rough time. You will do more than that too. You will fly. You just need to find your wings.
As you always said, "write to express, not impress". Let your life inspire you. Let the pen and paper carry you.
I will be here when you come back, because I have faith that you will.
You are like the ocean. you are calm, but you have your rougher days. You are beautiful, stunning, inspiring, deep....
but most of all you are strong.
You have a deep innner strenght that rises to the surface. You actions effect all those around you, and all of those on the boat apon you wish for better conditions.
your waves will one day circle the globe, and everyone will feel what you have to offer.
Because you do have so much.

goodluck my friend.

with everything the future brings.

~Jazlean

I enjoyed you reaching out, taking me by the hand and walking with me through some of your memories, your life and what made you who you are. I understand your thoughts here and the feelings and how close you have become with the characters, who they were in the beginning and who they became. Sometimes we must let go and other times, I etch in my mind the memory for those secret times I allow me to indulge again in my past.

I loved the ease I felt reading this as if you were leading me through, making I understood the feelings and the reasoning.

[Kevin Andros]

It's nice composition. Talking about the memories in the past. I like the thought that you lying on the bed and telling us what are you thinking about. Some people would overstretch this sort of thing (including me, lol), making it very boring, but this one is not. This is very nice. Nice work. ~KA~