The Demon

Something that got in my head one night... A very dark, fantastical piece, with a lot of Slavic pagan mythology influence...

The Demon

One night I saw,

what one shall not see.
The nightmares are,
still haunting me.
One cold winter night,
in the woods far away,
I saw a glimpse,
of light in my way.
Trough the forest it led me,
dancing in the wind,
to a scary place,
hidden from the world.
There, I saw,
the dance of spirits,
like women they were,
shrouded in green.
Beautiful they were,
with skin pale as the Moon.
But why did I fear them,
soon you will hear,
they bathed in blood,
crystal and clear.
Their eyes pierced my brain,
hipnotizing me.
Calling to join them,
I couldn't resist.
Falling in the pool,
I felt the warmth of blood,
And the cold embrace,
of our bodies bonding.
Lost in time,
As we made love.
Her body cold but delicate,
Pressed against mine,
I felt her warm lips,
Delicious as wine.
Bathing in sin,
I did not think,
that there was a price,
which I had to pay.
Inside their eyes,
there was no lust, only death,
Filling my mind,
With fear and pain.
I saw nightmares so real,
That left me terrified.
Scratching my skin with her claws,
Leaving the mark of the demon.
That night I escaped,
Crazed and naked,
Never to come back,
To that horrifying place.
Till this day I'm cursed,
Haunted by her, the demon,
Every night,
Never to be left alone...

Author's Note

I have some comma problems, probably because of the way I sing it inside my head while writing it.

Reviews

[Fran Marie]

beware the forest for the woods are full of demon spirits... this chilling piece was well worth the read....very much enjoyed!

[Robbie~xoxo~]

Sounds like a scary Succubus situation...
"abort the plan.... abort the plan". (kidding)

This is frightening tale, well penned! :)

[Uroš D. Stojanov..]

Vrlo mocno! Opisi su vividni, tempo je odlican... sve svidja mi se svidja. :)
Slazem se sto se tice zareza ali siguran sam da tako treba da bi se lakse pevalo.

Odlicno napisano, samo nastavi! :)

[The Mutterer]

I like this, especially the non-regular rhythm and rhyme. I think that adds variation to the poem - well done.

[Ravyne Hawke]

Yes, I see the similarities.. pretty freaky, eh? I like your flow on this.. the short sentences work really well.