mock personal statement

mock personal statement

A Story by Ella
"

Although it's classified as a story, it is in fact a complete and utter micky-take of what a personal statement should not be. I just got bored and wrote it but bare in mind that this is all true...

"

Personal Statement


Average, is the one word that I would use to describe myself. I have always been an average student in life; supported by the fact that I am average-looking, average at sport, obtain average grades, and am generally an all-round average person. It therefore did not surprise me when I found inspiration from Coldplay’s song; Fix you. The song tells the tale of an individual who tries their best, but has yet to succeed; I feel that I can personally relate to this number as I am just a standard, regular person who has nothing to offer. In all honesty, I never really achieve much that is worthy of anything.


I study French, Physical Education and Psychology. French taught me to hate the language even more, whereas Physical Education allowed me to become competent in the knowledge of how one can become aroused and the procedure that should be taken if one is approached by a woolly mammoth; both of which I found extremely intriguing.  


Moreover, I was appointed Physical Education prefect, being the only applicant appeared to be tough competition, as it was most likely better not to have me at all. Obtaining the role of a prefect taught me how to use the laminating machine, a staple gun for the display boards and plenty of other useful skills that will prove to be key to my studies at university. The coaching aspect of the Physical Education course was especially enthralling as I was given the fortunate opportunity to teach ten incompetent, whining, argumentative year sevens once a week; and, as well as working wonders for my confidence, it also gave the staff one less lesson to plan and instead, an extra ‘free’ period to do as they pleased.


During my work experience, I received a placement at the Beacon Centre in Beaconsfield. Although it did not quite give me the insight to the working world that I was hoping for, I was able to exert my vacuum cleaning and tea-making skills; most preferred theirs with milk and one sugar.


I enjoy sport, however, as a result of my anxiety; I have now become average in hockey as well as tennis and most other sports. Due to the fact that I captained the year four netball B-team, I was optimistic of gaining a position in the year seven netball squad, however, I felt crushed when I failed to make the final selection. I currently play hockey for my school, club and (in the past) county; throughout the season representing Bucks, I mostly sat on the sideline, warming-up for the best part of the game and then warming-down when reality struck me that I would never be played. I envied my team mates and their effortless ability to carry out skills that I could only dream of performing and I still hope that, that day will come.


Before I start University, I plan to spend a gap year at an International school in Norway. The main principal of the school is to take part in non-academic activities and have fun; something which the British Education System does not know the meaning of. 


I have now gotten used to the feeling of rejection and the disappointments that life throws at me and although I cannot say that I would contribute an awful lot towards university life, I hope that I will meet other students who are also average and, like me, are able to take inspiration from Coldplay’s song. I will therefore try to fix myself. 

© 2010 Ella


Author's Note

Ella
Please comment if you like it, it would mean the world to me!

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Featured Review

Awesome write! I found this absolutely hilarious, and thought that it was written really well. This was a quirky, fun, creative write, told through the voice of a likeable character with a strong personality. Coldplay is one of my favourite bands, so I was definitely able to identify and appreciate your incorporation of 'Fix You' in the story. This made me both smile and sympathise. :P I loved it,
~PaperHearts

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

It's very witty. That I like. However(how you must dread that damned transition), it was worded awkwardly in a lot of places taking away from the beauty of it all. Therefore, I recommended you to read your things aloud while editing to improve the awkwardness. Also, the story was lovely. It really was a pleasure to read.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Awesome write! I found this absolutely hilarious, and thought that it was written really well. This was a quirky, fun, creative write, told through the voice of a likeable character with a strong personality. Coldplay is one of my favourite bands, so I was definitely able to identify and appreciate your incorporation of 'Fix You' in the story. This made me both smile and sympathise. :P I loved it,
~PaperHearts

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I like this girl. She isn't boring. She is a active girl with many skills. Always hardest person to be proud of their deed. Is the person doing them. I like the story. A person who tries many things become stronger and more skill at life. I like the ending. A excellent story.
Coyote

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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1958 Views
3 Reviews
Added on October 25, 2010
Last Updated on October 25, 2010
Tags: personal statement, university, education, comedy, sarcasm, dry humour, story of my life

Author

Ella
Ella

Writing
Grandad's memoirs Grandad's memoirs

A Story by Ella