Miss Dustbin-Head and Class 13 go to the Zoo

in an ideal world this story would be accompanied by pictures but you'll just have to use your imagination.

Miss Dustbin-Head is a teacher at the worst school in England.

She teaches Class 13 which is full of very naughty children, children like these

Archibald Cat-Dangler, he puts worms up his nose, and then pulls them out of his ears.

Eleanor Von Trout-Face, she has mice that live in her hair.

Jeremy Stinkenpuke, he smells like a rotten cabbage and looks like a mouldy turnip.

Valerie McWeasel, she has long pointy fingernails and crooked, yellow teeth.

One day Miss Dustbin-Head decided to take class 13 on a trip to the zoo.

She caught them all in a net, and threw them in the back of a van.

When they got to the zoo it was foggy, and they couldn’t see any of the animals.

They walked right past the giraffes and didn’t see them.

They walked right past the gorillas and didn’t see them.

They couldn’t see a thing, but suddenly they felt a steel fence. WHACK! OW!!

They couldn’t see the lion behind them but they heard it ROAR!!!

Just then the fog cleared, they were standing right in the middle of the lion’s den.

“Please don’t eat us!” screamed the children. “We promise to behave!”

Miss Dustbin-Head stood in front of Class 13 and took the dustbin off her head.

The children and the lions couldn’t believe it; Miss Dustbin-Head was so beautiful.

“Don’t eat these children” said Miss Dustbin-Head. “Eat these toffee apples instead!”

Everyone knows that lions like toffee apples the best.

“We wouldn’t eat them” said the chief lion. “You are very pretty but they look disgusting.”

Class 13 walked back to the bus, past the elephants, the owls and the penguins, the tigers and the bears.

All the animals stopped and stared at Miss Dustbin-Head and didn’t eat any of the children.

The next day Class 13 all sat still and worked for five whole minutes.

Sometimes you don’t need to be scary like a lion or wear a dustbin on your head.  Sometimes you just need to be yourself.