Four Years

Four years later, I woke up knowing this date meant something--

The day I fell for your words again.

Manipulation drove the fear I held onto so tightly.

I needed you. To go anywhere. To be worth anything.

It's ok. I need you. I am lost. I am nothing.

Excitement plastered on my face, you are doing me a favor.

Who would I be if you were not there to tell me?

Your unutilized psychology degree hangs on your bedroom wall.

It entitles, empowers, permits you to tell me how I feel, who I need to be.

Remind me again of my stagnancy.

You will build me, but you can break me.

How do I stand up for you when you just tear me down?

How can I look up to you when you just let me down?

My friends are tired of hearing about you.

Truth be told, I'm tired of thinking about you.

Maybe I'm lying to protect you.

It's impossible to decipher when you're trying to be happy,

Or when you're trying not to laugh,

Or when you're trying to not lose control.

You lash out at me like a child, then you beg for me like change.

Next, you say you make me better, but you are my ball and chain.

But my plan to leave you behind is obstructed by your plan to do the same.

Reviews

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i get the emotions and the hurt in this piece yet so relatable in a sense. Good read