Ode to Myself

I am working on a series of poems. This is a work in progress, but I wanted to post it here and see what you all think.

There are moments where I can’t seem to find the strength to breathe.

When I can’t breathe, my hands shake.

When my hands shake, my whole body grows cold.

When my body is cold, my lips turn a light blue.

When my lips are blue, my brain is turned off.

When my brain is turned off, I don’t think.

When I can’t think, I can’t control the nerves that bundle in the pit of my stomach.

 

It is hard to think when I am not given the power.

These nerves feel like I am a battery that only gets ten minutes a day to charge.

They feel like the passenger of a car that speeds way too fast down a highway.

They feel like the eyes of someone who first walks outside only to be blinded by the sun.

A chair on the verge of flipping over, but it never moves regardless.

 

I am constantly on edge with everything in my life.

When I can’t think, I jump to conclusions that aren’t ever logical.

It is hard to not lose my sanity when I can’t control it.

My sanity is soap in a shower,

slipping through my fingers constantly,

and the water feels so cold against my bare skin.

 

But sometimes I find a towel and I cover myself.

Sometimes I turn the water off.

The room grows warmer

And the goose bumps upon my skin disappear for a while.

When the goose bumps are gone, I am not as cold.

My lips aren’t light blue.

My hands don’t shake.

I can breathe,

even if only for a moment.

That is the moment that keeps me going.

That is why I am proud to be who I am. 

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Honest and strong words dear friend.
"When the goose bumps are gone, I am not as cold.
My lips aren’t light blue.
My hands don’t shake.
I can breathe,
even if only for a moment.
That is the moment that keeps me going.
That is why I am proud to be who I am. "
After we survive the bad days. We learn how strong we can be. Thank you Samantha for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Shiv]

Hi Samantha. I really enjoyed the metaphors in your poem - particularly sanity being like soap slipping through your hands. My advice would be to chop each line down and mix it up a bit, so that the poem is more concise and you aren't often starting lines with words like 'When', 'Sometimes', and 'They feel like'.