Whitney

Whitney

A Poem by sedulous_mind

7 years old you were,
blond hair, pretty face,
so young and so much problems.

ADHD a difficult form,
an eating disorder,
and a family falling apart.

A father only showing love to your brother,
drinking alcohol and threatening your mom,
Au pairs all leaving after a short time.

Medication and psychologist appointments,
surgeries, and lastly, artificial feeding.

Pain, injections
and lots of painkillers,
no one there for you.

No parents at home,
only an 18 year old au pair,
waking you up in the morning,
and feeding you artificially at night.

What a childhood,
school, doctor's appointments,
and homework.

Separation of your parents,
moving and transfeering schools.

Countless tantrums,
fears and rejection.

Childhood...




















© 2021 sedulous_mind


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When I first started reading, I thought: this isn't very poetic! Kinda factual & blunt-sounding, like a dossier, rather than painting a word portrait. But then as the poem goes on, I came to appreciate your cold & clinical approach. The story itself is so dramatic, you almost need to stand back & get out of the way, not add anything more dramatic to it.

You run the risk, with older readers, of sounding a little too "poor me" (not YOU, but the narrator in this poem) if you paint a story like this with tons of tea & sympathy. I love that you put it in a boom-boom-boom factual reel. In my youth (50, 60 yrs ago) most kids never heard of these disorders, we never went to doctors for anything & we didn't take any meds. We just grunted our way thru family abuse & emotional disturbances. I think it's more regrettable that the narrator in your poem seems to have been inflicted with as much agony from her bad homelife as she's gotten from all those who are purportedly trying to "help" her. She's so stigmatized, she may never think of herself as capable & strong & normal again. I can understand why some over-identify with a disorder, defining themselves by it, & you show all this poignantly without being poignant about it (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 4 Months Ago


You described a hard struggle. Not a easy life. You made the reader understand the struggle. Thank you for sharing the powerful and worthwhile poetry.
Coyote

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

sedulous_mind

5 Months Ago

Thank you for your kind words Coyote :)
Coyote Poetry

5 Months Ago

You are welcome my friend.

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2 Reviews
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Added on March 10, 2021
Last Updated on March 10, 2021
Tags: childhood, struggle, illness


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