heaven without a god

heaven without a god

I never asked for this 
I never wanted to walk along the lines of skepticism
To argue your words and fight for your name 
Wondering where he has gone? 
What he is doing? 
Why? 

I use to ask if you’ll return to share a bedtime story 
He no longer exist my mother would say 
“He left before you birth” she said. 
I knew her response was lie
He loves all and would return to hold me 
He is the father, the head of the household
He loves all and would return to hold me 

But that was then 
When I was young and small and needed mothers bosom for bed 
And like all children I let go of my imaginary friend
You will not return 
Despite my prayers 
You will not return 
To tell me to shave with strong strokes to avoid irritation
To tell me to walk with my chest and head held high 
To say “Hey son lets go out and play” 
To be there when she passes 
To give me strength 

Oh, how I believed, believed, believed 
How I wanted it to be true 
How I longed for the moments were you’d whisper 
I love you